Chapter 352 The Weight Of Guilt And Love
Rowena's eyes were shimmering with untold emotions as she entered the privacy of her study room along with her husband trailing behind.
The dim light from the chandeliers hanging from the ceiling cast a muted glow, highlighting her long, flowing black hair and the smoothness of her soft, pale skin. It was still morning as the crimson hue filled the entire room.
As the door slowly closed behind her with a soft creak, Asher's tall and broad frame shadowed the entrance, following silently in her wake, his dark yellow eyes remaining fixated on this bewitching gothic beauty before him.
She and Asher didn't even wait to announce his return officially and came here right away.
Her mind was racing with so many questions, and she was having a hard time deciding what to ask first.
But she was also worried about him taking the blame for what happened to Drakon, especially since he also had agreed to the spar.
He skillfully crippled Drakon in such a way that they wouldn't realize it until later.
She felt moved, knowing he did it for her even though she would rather take responsibility than him. He had just returned, and she couldn't bear to let any trouble find him already.
She turned, her black dress twirling gracefully, concern rippling across her face, "You should have let me handle Dra—" she began, her voice low and gentle, but she was abruptly silenced.
Without warning, Asher closed the distance between them, his arm snaking around her slender waist in a swift, possessive move. He pulled her close, sealing their lips in a fervent, passionate kiss.
Rowena's eyes widened momentarily in surprise, but then they fluttered shut, lost in the intensity of the moment.
"Mmnn~"
The ambiance of the room seemed to change, as if time itself had paused to witness their union.
The warmth and love behind Asher's kiss were undeniable, and Rowena, feeling it all, responded in kind.
This was the first time he was kissing her with such fervor, and without him saying anything, she could feel that he shared her emotions, including how much he missed her, just like she missed him.
She also felt relieved and put a lot of doubts in her heart to rest, especially considering how strange things were with him before he left.
Her hands delicately trailed up to rest on his muscular chest, fingers splayed, feeling the heat of his body.
Asher kept sucking on her velvety, oily black lips, cherishing them with his tongue while relishing in its irresistible taste.
His passionate kiss stroked the flames of her feelings, making her pour every emotion she was feeling right now into her kiss despite not being used to it.
The elation and relief she was feeling now couldn't be put into words.
She could hear the blood flowing through his heart increasing, and the scent of it was making her blood dance as well, as if sharing her happiness with his return.
When the need for air became too great, Asher reluctantly pulled back, but only slightly as strands of their love clung to their lips.
Their foreheads touching, he stared deeply into her crimson eyes, cupping her cheek with his hand, "I missed you so much," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion.
"I missed you more," Rowena softly said as she smiled and hugged him, her hands wrapping around his body as if she couldn't bear to let him go again.
Upon feeling her soft, warm body pressing against his, Asher welcomed her into his embrace as well.
It felt great to hold her again and look into her eyes that held warmth behind its cold, dark layer. Ever since he left the quest, there wasn't a day where he didn't think about her.
But most of the days, he was filled with heartache while thinking of her, not knowing what to do with her and his feelings. He even tried to stop thinking about her but couldn't. Not even the dangers of the quest distracted him from it.
Only towards the end of the quest did he realize how much of a fool he was.
Yet, his heart was heavy with the fact that he had to keep deceiving her until he was ready to tell the truth. Until then, he could only do so much to make up for it.
With a gentle sigh, Asher began, "I know you are eager to hear back slightly, curiosity lighting up her eyes.
Raising an eyebrow, she watched intently as Asher's fingers deftly about the quest and everything. But before I talk about it, there's something I want to give you other than some gifts which I will give you later," His voice held a depth of sincerity, making Rowena pull back slightly, curiosity lighting up her eyes.
Raising an eyebrow, she watched intently as Asher's fingers deftly reached into his pocket, producing a gleaming amulet.
The mystical object caught the sunlight, radiating a soft yet dark glow. Her eyes widened in recognition, "Isn't that your..."
With a soft yet determined smile, Asher nodded, "I want you to hold onto my Deviar. I trust you to keep it safe."
Rowena's crimson eyes searched his, a mix of astonishment and wonder, "Ash, are you certain?" she questioned, her voice carrying a note of disbelief, "People who possess a Deviar hide it themselves. They'd never let anyone know of its whereabouts, not even their own kin. It wouldn't be wrong to treat it as your lifeline, and I believe it would be best if you hide it yourself and never tell anybody else, not even me."
He nodded affirmatively, looking deep into her eyes, "I know except you are my lifeline," Asher admitted, "That's why I want you to hide it. And besides," he added with a playful chuckle, "I'm terrible at hiding things. It'd honestly be safer with you. I have no reason to doubt otherwise."
Rowena sighed, a blend of exasperation and fondness, "Ash..." She felt her heart filling up with inexplicable emotions upon seeing that he wanted to trust her with it.
She knew he wouldn't take 'no' for an answer and will only come up with silly excuses. Taking the amulet, she clutched it close, her fingers wrapping around it firmly, "I promise, I'll guard this with my life."
Shaking his head with affectionate firmness, Asher cupped her hands, emphasizing each word, "Remember, it's just a lifeless object. Your life means so much more to me, Rona. So never put yourself before it."
Asher knew entrusting his Deviar to her wouldn't really make up for anything, but that was all he could do now.
He was willing to put his fate in her hands even though he knew it may not end well.
Rowena gently nodded, the weight of the amulet heavier than ever, "It's your turn now," she began, her voice soft yet insistent, "Did you truly keep your promise? Did you risk everything to get this Deviar despite what I asked you before you left?"
Asher's features tightened, and he winced visibly, causing Rowena's crimson eyes to narrow slightly. He cleared his throat, a hint of hesitation evident, "Can you promise not to get mad if I tell you everything?" he ventured.
Rowena's response was immediate and sharp, "Asher…"
Feeling her piercing gaze, Asher raised his hands in a placating gesture as he chuckled, "Alright, alright, I'll tell you," Taking a deep breath, he began recounting the perilous journey during the quest.
But as Asher delved deeper into his story, Rowena's gaze grew heavier with every passing revelation.
She felt a lump in her throat each time he described a dangerous encounter, especially when he spoke of his run-ins with Hunters and almost losing his life before the werewolves and the draconians.
Each account was a vivid reminder of the near-death experiences he faced, and the very real possibility of losing him forever. And there was nothing she could have done about it.
Asher's voice, which had remained even-tempered throughout his retelling, finally wavered when he described the last, most harrowing event.
However, he had to leave out the part where he fought with his past self and could only describe it as a moment of enlightenment, which wasn't really far from the truth.
He couldn't tell anything that could be related to his past life and also left out the part regarding Sabina and Edmund. Now wouldn't be a good time for Rowena to unearth the lies he had said in the last 3 years.
By the time he finished, Rowena's eyes were glistening with unshed tears, her face reflecting a deep-seated guilt.
"You have the right to feel mad for-"
"I should've been with you," she whispered, her voice choked with emotion, "I had no idea you suffered so much."
Her blood also boiled with anger towards everyone who almost killed him or tried to have him killed.
But she felt better, knowing he killed everyone who tried to kill him.
However, she was determined to find out why the Moonbinder Clan was offering tempting bounties for his head, especially when he personally never offended them.
Other than being mortal enemies in general, could it be because they knew his potential was too great to be left alone? Or could it be something else too?
With a gentle motion, Asher tilted her chin up, forcing her to meet his gaze, "Rona," he murmured soothingly, "Don't blame yourself. You already know our home needs your presence. Also, if you hadn't stayed behind, I wouldn't have been so motivated to get back. And honestly," he added, a small smile playing on his lips, "Every challenge made me stronger. I wouldn't be the same man standing before you if not for them."
Rowena stared at him, her crimson eyes swimming with a mix of relief, gratitude, and lingering worry.
She nodded, her gaze softening as memories of her father's teachings echoed in her mind, "You are right. My father always said that trials and tribulations shape a warrior," she began, her voice gentle and introspective while Asher's eyes flickered for a moment.
Rowena added, "They mold and harden the spirit, making it unbreakable. I won't deny, Ash, that hearing your ordeals pains me. Yet, I am proud that you faced them and emerged stronger. No one else deserves the Deviar more than you."
Asher looked into her eyes, the weight of gratitude and love evident.
His smile was bittersweet as he confessed, "The thought of you helped me get past them. But I didn't make it through alone." He paused, emotion coating his words, "Those three and Callisa gave it their all for me."
Rowena's warm smile returned, "I had a feeling they'd have your back since you chose them, except for Ceti, who I already knew wouldn't fail her duties. She and your maid fulfilled their duties. But Isola went to great lengths, it seems. So I will handsomely reward her for that. And as for Callisa," she mused with a hint of a smile, "I'll think of something special."
Asher's expression shifted then, a shadow passing over his face, "Rona, about Isola and Ceti..." His voice lowered slightly, and he took a deep breath, preparing himself, "There's something you need to know…"
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