Chapter 235 235:Roan's Agony
"Hey, don't curse that poor guy. His condition isn't that worse.'' Axel spoke, trying to calm Lucas.
"Thank God!" Lucas heaved in relief but the next second, Axel's words poured cold water on him again.
"I heard that his arm had been broken and he went to the infirmary but despite this, I saw his left arm wrapped in bandages and his condition looked worse. I tried to ask him about this but he ran away ignoring me."
A deep frown appeared across Lucas's face.
"Is he being bullied?" Lucas asked.
"I asked around a bit but I am not sure," Axel answered hurriedly, feeling the temperature of the place dropping by a few margins.
"I will take a look then. Thanks for informing me." Lucas patted Axel's shoulder and walked away hurriedly looking for Roan.
'I hope the worst hasn't happened.'
Lucas thought while calming himself.
…......
Inside the room, Raon sat motionless with a depressed look staring at a torn shoe with moist eyes.
His body was battered and filled with bruises and he held his broken aching hand thinking about all the mess.
"I shouldn't have become greedy."
"People like me who belong to the bottom of society shouldn't dream too much."
Drops of tears leaked across his face as his father's words echoed in his mind.
He thought that he would never be bullied again but his hope was crushed brutally.
The advice of his father started ringing in his head.
[Son, don't let yourself get tricked by others and have grand ambitions. Everyone has a destiny and ours is to grovel at the bottom trying our hardest to lead a better life. Changing one's destiny isn't a matter of a few words but requires effort and sacrifices. When one gains one thing, one is bound to lose them. That's why poor commoners always try to live conservatively trying to protect what they have.]
[If possible, I don't want you to go into a hell hole. But since you are so adamant and fixated about this, then go and witness the society with your own eyes.]
Roan closed his murky eyes and in the deep darkness, he replayed the events of the past.
His worldview shattered when the place that he thought was the temple of learning was nothing but a place like outlaws.
But when he was saved from bullying and started living a worry-free life, he thought that he could overcome the walls with his effort.
Along with them, he would shine and make a name after all who in the world didn't want to leave his or her name in history?
Though he behaved detached, inwardly he craved for respect, strength and power. Being with them, he always felt that he was dragging them down and that in the future, he might become everyone's weak point.
So, he tried...he tried very hard.
He trained his body, he trained his mind. He did everything he could but his realm seemed to be struck and hit a wall, unable to break it down.
Still, he thought it was okay until they appeared.
Roan's whole body quivered remembering their chilling gazes.
Roan after waking up, as soon as he stepped out of the infirmary was carried by three people. Without giving him any reason they started beating him and then broke his right arm and warned him that they would break it again if he dared to visit the infirmary to heal or use a healing potion.
At first, he didn't take it to heart and looked for others but to his horror none of his friends were present.
It was for the second time, Roan had felt despair and nerve-wrecking fear. Concealing himself, he went inside the infirmary to get treated thinking that fate and those people wouldn't be so cruel.
However, he was proved wrong again.
They found him and broke his healed hand again, stomping over it mercilessly.
He could still hear the curses ringing in his ears.
This incident made him aware once again of just how weak he is.
It was a reality check that made him understand that in the end, one needs to stand up for himself because you can't hide under other shadows and expect to always be protected by them.
Roan slumped down and held his head.
"God, was it wrong to depend on others?"
"Should weaklings like us have no right to dream?!!" Roan shouted.
RING!RING!RING
BANG!BANG!BANG!BANG!
Roan ignored the doorbell but at the next second the sound of the door getting smashed rang again.
Roan got up and saw a figure by opening the grills on stile, and closed it immediately.
"Lucas, can you give me some space? I need some peace."
"I can't Roan. I heard something happened, are you okay?" Lucas asked anxiously from the other side.
A brief silence lingered for a moment.
"Roan!…Roan!!…"Lucas shouted on hearing no reply.
"Is everything okay?"
"Yes, everything's fine, it's just that I want some peace," Roan said, biting his lips.
"Just leave now, Lucas and I don't want to stay in the group any more."
"What? Why?"Lucas asked in bewilderment.
Roan paused a bit remembering the bullies' harsh words as they kicked him onto the floor.
[They can protect you now but what about in future? It's not as if they are your nanny or security guard, hovering around 24 hours.]
[Stop dreaming. You can never fit among them. Did you think you could be carp leaping over Dragon Gate just by mingling with nobles who are at the top? Stop being a fool, you pathetic piece of shit. A loser will always be a loser.
"Everyone has crossed 3-Star while I am still stuck at early 2-Star. I am now feeling ashamed to stay in your group. I know I am dragging you all down, that's why it's enough now. I don't want to be a burden on you. If this goes on I will become the team's weak point just like the orphanage incident." Roan spoke as drops of tears slid down his cheek.
Lucas heard Roan's outbreak and was now sure that the worst thing had happened. The bullies had affected his psychology and flared his inferiority complex.
"Roan. don't be like that. You know that the reason all of them were able to advance so quickly was due to having a higher bloodline. If you had a higher bloodline, I am sure you could also break through to 3-Star by now." Lucas spoke trying to comfort him but it backfired on him.
"Higher grade bloodline? Don't you also have a bronze grade bloodline and you still managed to reach the 3-Star rank while I am stuck in 2-Star even though I had a silver rank bloodline." Roan spoke in a saddened voice.
Lucas frowned on hearing Roan's words.
'Shit.' Lucas cursed himself.
Though he was trying to calm Roan, he knew in the end it was a lie and only he knew how he was able to get here.
Everyone who managed to break through the wall despite having an inferior bloodline had something else to compensate for that.
The famous mercenary who managed to go past the wall and reach 9-Star used an artefact to trade his lifespan to increase his potential
And, the real reason why Lucas can break through quickly on top of his hard work was because of upgrading his bloodline from bronze to golden grade bloodline so how can it be easy for Roan to catch up with them while he only had a Silver grade bloodline?
For a moment he was at a loss for words and felt as if his tongue had been tied. It was a situation where he didn't know what to do.
"See, you also know the truth," Roan spoke sarcastically.
"That's why you should stop giving me false hopes, Lucas."
"Roan, I never meant that?" Lucas spoke in an apologetic voice trying to hide his guilt.
"Leave it, Lucas, I know the truth. I can't break through quickly and will soon reach my limit and can't advance further," Roan spoke as he wiped his tears.
"Don't lose hope, Roan. Let us think about something. There must be something that could help you." Lucas spoke, trying to calm down Roan.
"I am not losing hope, Lucas. It's just, I am afraid."
"Afraid of what?" Lucas was unable to understand what was going on in Roan's mind.
"I am afraid of being left alone. I am afraid of going back to my loser self when I was bullied. If our strength difference becomes quite big, I know we will be separated from each other."
The more Roan spoke the more agitated he became. Thinking about the bleak future without his friends made him scared.
"I am afraid of being too dependent on you all to the point that I will lose the meaning of my existence. You might be here today but what about tomorrow and in the future? You can't babysit me and protect me. Once you are absent, I will fall into that deep abyss from which I crawled.'' Roan's words choked at the end.
'Damn it!' Lucas clenched his fist standing outside the door.
Lucas bit his lips, unable to refute a single word. Each word of Roan stabbed his heart as if blaming him for pulling him here.
And there was no falsity because it was indeed he who intervened in Roan's life and brought him to this stage instead of pushing him away when he had the chance.
"What's worse than all of this is being with you all, I would taste the higher society, it would boost my ego. And once I am used to it, I might not be able to go back to my previous life even if I want and my greed along with hunger for power, I may take a wrong step losing myself entirely."
"Fuck!" Lucas cursed feeling that things might get out of hand if Roan kept on going like this. He needed to enter the room first to do anything as in a broken state like this people aren't sane enough to listen to words and persuasion.
"ROAN!'' Lucas roared, making Roan standing behind the door shudder.
"I will count to ten. If you don't open the door within that time, I will blow this entire damn door. So first open it and then we'll talk peacefully."
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