ONE HUNDRED NINE: The Chainer, I
109
The trip back toward Apex was so silent it made Aldens skin crawl.
When hed first returned to the SUV, Lute had said, I dont want to talk about it, before Alden had begun to develop a decent question. Then hed told the driver to take them to campus without even asking if it was all right.
Of course, it was all right. Alden would have decided to head back himself most likely. Interfering with Manon to help people had sounded difficult but worth a try. Interfering with her and Lutes family?
He didnt understand how the two were connected. And even if hed had all the detailshe was now worried the scale of the matter was beyond his ability to handle.
Have I already stuck my foot too far in it by sending the letters? Can I still pull back?
Why on Earth would the message hed sent prompt Laura to call Lutes mother?
He thought over the snippet of conversation hed heard in the hallway. He tried to remember everything he knew about the Velras.
LeafSong, he thought, letting his head fall back so that he was staring up through the SUVs tinted moonroof. When Lute was asking whether I minded being his roommate, he told me Aulia mentioned I was assigned there. And it stuck out because hed heard members of his family say the university name before.
At the time, Alden had been more focused on other things. Hed brushed it off. Neha had heard of the wizard university, too, so it hadnt seemed that strange that the Velras might bring it up from time to time. It was an even more prestigious school than hed realized when he was doing the job there. Hed decided that hearing an Avowed who was familiar with Artonan culture mention it in passing must be like hearing someone mention Oxford or MIT. It didnt necessarily mean they had a personal connection to the institution.
What if Aulia does, though? Through the boater
He could imagine a few reasons for people to want a way into the schoolcozying up to important wizards while they were young, gaining access to powerful families, maybe even something like collecting information on youthful transgressions to save for later. If Joe could take advantage of that kind of thing, then possibly human blackmailers could as well?
Its all guessing.
What was less of a guess was the fact that the boater wasnt just a messed up version of a union for Manon and her friends. The Velras wouldnt care about something like that. And Alden had wondered on more than one occasion why Manon would care so much about the boater herself. It was odd for a Rabbit who got plenty of work on her own to be so obsessed with monopolizing and controlling the campus posting.
The money was amazing. The connections were amazing. And those things gave her a tighter grip on her collection of human assets. Maybe, hed thought, it was enough of an excuse.
But it made more sense if there was something else at stakefor Manon at least. The boater had to be a lot of work to maintain. She shelled out her own money when they were on campus to keep them happy.
I freaking hate schemes, politics, and power struggles, he decided.
Night had fallen, and a river of oncoming headlights greeted them as they approached the Span. Lute had been staring quietly through his window for the past half hour, hands clenched together in his lap.
Youre not going to say anything? he asked suddenly. His face was still turned away from Alden.
You didnt want me to. And I dont know enough to say anything. Sorry for Alden didnt understand the situation well enough to know if he should apologize or not. Sorry to accidentally involve you in something that might be bigger and more personal for you than I realized. I thought I was just going to talk to someone Id met once. I didnt know.
Hed wanted it to take an hour and then, whether it went well or badly, be over.
Dont worry about it, Lute said in a dull voice. Its not like its your fault. I have such a busy family. I suppose that when someone mentions a shady thing going down on Anesidora, I shouldnt be surprised if theyre right in the middle of it. Im living proof that Aulia gets away with illegal crap all the time, arent I?
He was still clutching the bottle of mustache glue in his hand. Alden thought he must have forgotten he was holding it.
I have some relatives who think every bizarre thing that happens to someone in our family happens because Aulia has fucked around with fate a few times. Theyre wrong. Our lives are full of strange, dramatic, odious shit because Aulia fucks around with everything, every minute, of every hour, of every day. And they let her. They help her.
Why? Alden asked.
Lute shrugged. Maybe they all love it as much as she does. Or maybe they just love her. Every time I feel like I get it, a little, I end up being more wrong and morefucked around withthan before. I see how living with it for decades makes some of them think theyre cursed or blessed or whatever, though. Coincidence feels like magic sometimes.
He shifted around in his seat to look at Alden. Id only just realized you didnt know anything about my parents. I was thinking it was nice that Id get to tell you about them myself and present it how I wanted to. And fifteen minutes later, you run into MomJessicadoing Aulias bidding in the hall of a random apartment building.
Thats what you wanted to tell me about?
You didnt know she wasnt Avowed, said Lute.
Alden shook his head.
You asked me if I was in a special class for high ranks when I was younger. Thats how I realized. They wouldnt have put me in that kind of class even if one existed. His smile was bitter. If they sorted kids that way, theyd have needed to dig a basement below the school to stuff me in. Do you know what they call people who have Avowed parents but who never get selected?
No
Whiffs. Like their parents took a swing in a game of baseball and missed. Sorry, you struck out.
Thats cruel, Alden said quietly.
Whiff is the cutest word for it. Believe me. MoJessica is Aulias big whiff, said Lute. And Cyril is a whiff, too. His parents are C-ranks.
Cyrils your father?
Yes. Lute glanced down at the bottle of glue, then dropped it into his cup holder. Ive always thought so anyway. But that being true became very unlikely the moment I was selected. I look pitiful and stupid if I pretend I dont know that.
He drew his legs up toward his chest and put his feet on the dark leather seat. Do you know what the kid of two whiffs is supposed to be?
Alden could guess.
Human. Lute gazed up through the moonroof. The flickering lights of drones mingled with the stars. I was supposed to be human.
After a moment of silence, one corner of his mouth turned up. Sometimes I wonder if the System enjoyed it. Picking me. Putting its fist right through the middle of my plans and everyone elses. I know its not supposed to enjoy things. But I bet it did that day. Just a little.
What was it like? Alden asked. He couldnt imagine it. Hed grown up knowing he would most likely never be selected, even if hed had his hopes and Hannahs theories. But hed belonged to a whole world full of people who wouldnt be chosen. To grow up here, where almost everyone was or would be Avowed, had to be a completely different experience.
It was likesomeone flung me into the sky when Id spent my whole entire life teaching myself how to be happy with the ground.
******
Cabin 2 - Libra
North Point Marina
Anesidora
eleven years ago
******
One of Lute Velras earliest memories was of an argument between his parents. About him. He remembered waking up to the sound of it one morning. The night before, hed asked to sleep in the big bed because of a nightmare, and the covers were still warm around him when he opened his eyes.
The angry whispers and the sound of his own name made him scared and curious at the same time. He hid his face beneath the sheet. It was morning, and the room was bright. In the golden, glowing world under the sheet, he learned new things about himself that he wasnt old enough yet to understand.
His father was mad. His mother was crying.
The problem seemed to be that Lute was too short. Or that he was going to be too short in the future.
Am I?
Such a difficult idea to get a handle on. He was short because he was the youngest person on the whole ship. He was short because he was only just getting started growing. He was cutethe cutestall the crew said so. And that was a good thing, wasnt it?
What do you mean you dont want him treated for it?! his father shouted. Its easier if they start while hes young! Everyone will torment him enough as it is. Why the hell would you do that to him, Jessica?
Is he mad at me? thought Lute.
His heart was beating faster. He didnt like the yelling.
Hes healthy! Hes completely healthy, and hes beautiful! his mother said in a tearful voice. Theres nothing wrong with him.
Its fine when hes four! Its going to be something else when hes a grown man, and its not like the System will ever be an option for him. I know you dont mind looking like some kind of Artonan doll, but my son
Fuck you! Lutes mother screamed.
There was a thump as something hit the wall, and then another. Then another.
Are you throwing shoes at me now?!
Get out! Leave! Get off my familys boat!
Lute didnt understand what was going on. He was trembling under the sheet. His eyes were shut tight.
GET OUT!
The door slammed.
A minute later, the mattress sank and a hand fell softly on his covered head. Did we scare you, baby? his mother whispered. Im sorry. Its all right. Mommy and Daddy are just having a bad morning.
Lute sniffled. Is something wrong with me?
Of course not.
Am I ugly?
Ugly? The sheet was tugged off him, and a finger tapped him on the cheek. Youre my little prince, and youre perfect.
Daddy said
Perfect, his mother repeated, leaning over to rub her nose against his until he giggled. The most perfect little boy in all of Apex! Has Mommy ever lied to you?
No.
Thats right, said his mother. Why dont we go swimming today?
All day, Lute said at once.
All day, she agreed. Ill tell them to heat up the pool. Maybe your Grandma will even come play with us.
Will she buy me another present?
Do you want her to?
Lute nodded.
Then she will!
******
Another of Lutes first memories, from around the same time, was the moment he realized he wouldnt ever be able to do magic.
Of course hed always known he wouldnt be an Avowed. Nobody had kept it a secret. It was a fact about himself, just like all the others. His name was Lute Velra. He was nearly five years old. He liked grapes, mandarinfish, and his music tutor, Mrs. Yu.
The System would not pick him. He was an ordinary human, like his mother.
He knew but, somehow, hed missed the fact that being an Avowed was how people did magic. Hed thought they were two separate things.
He was in the pool on the afternoon when the news finally crashed down on him. His arms were supported by inflatable swim wings, and his face was in the water so that he could see through the glass bottom to one of the yachts sitting rooms on the deck below. His cousin Hazel was there with Grandma Aulia.
He pulled his head up. Can I go see Grandma?
His mother, lounging on the long white deck sofa and typing on her computer, shook her head. No, shes teaching Hazel right now.
It felt like Lute had been hearing that a lot lately. Whats she teaching?
Wordchains, baby. You know that.
I can do one. I can do that one you taught me. Sometimes.
When it worked, it made him just a little dizzy, which was funny. And then it made him just a little not-dizzy, which was boring. His mother said it was one of the easiest wordchains there was, but shed still been proud of him when he got it right.
Teach me the one that makes the water move, said Lute. Ill practice hard.
His mother looked away from the screen. The one that makes the water move?
Lute splashed and stared up at the flying droplets. The retractable roof was closed over the pool today, with the panels lit up to warm and light the deck.
Like that, he said, splashing again. Teach me to do that.
Jessica closed the laptop.
You mean Water Shaping, she said slowly. Thats not a wordchain. Its something Avowed do. Shapers.
Yes! Teach me!
Lute, weve talked about this, she said. Youre not going to be Avowed. Youre like Mommy.
I know. He loved his mother. He was glad they werent Avowed together.
Only Avowed can be Water Shapers.
Lute stared at her. I cant be?
She shook her head.
But why?
Because the System doesnt pick many people, said Jessica. It picks most boys and girls whose parents are Avowed. But if your parents arent, it almost never picks you. And if it doesnt pick you, you cant do magic.
Why?
Thats just how it is. She paused. Im sorry.
Arent wordchains magic? There was a tight, sick feeling in his stomach. I can do the dizzy one.
Theyre not the same. I can perform wordchains, too. A lot of them. Enough that nobody worried too much Jessica shook her head. But I cant do other kinds of magic. And I never will be able to. And your father cant. And you cant.
But, thought Lute. But
Everyone could do magic. Everyone he had ever met. All the adults anyway. Talents, skills, spells, pointsthese were the things people talked about. These were the things you got for being a grown-up.
Avowed meant you went to see the Artonans sometimes. It was all right if Lute couldnt do that. But making water into animal shapes and flying and reading the names painted on the sides of ships and boats even though they were kilometers awaythose were different. Lute wanted those things. He wanted to be like the cabin stewardess who made the bed every morning without using her hands. He wanted to be like the crewman who checked the hull sometimes without ever coming up for air.
The current in the pool had spun him around. He kicked his feet to face his mother again.
I cant do magic? he asked.
She shook her head.
Not even a little?
No.
What about when Im as old as Grandma? Then will I be able to?
You wont.
He panicked. It wasnt okay. It was like someone had stolen his birthday. In that moment, he couldnt fathom a worse outcome. He was different. He was different in a bad way. And it wasnt fair.
His thoughts rocketed around. What if Im good? What if Im good every year all year? I will be!
Like for Santa Claus.
Lute, said Jessica, no.
What if I try my hardest? What if I practice every day?
Like he did for Mrs. Yu.
Lute
Sometimes the System picks people! Sometimes it picks globals!
Yes! This was it. Sometimes Avowed didnt come from Anesidora. He remembered now! Sometimes they come from other countries all over the world. And those Avowed had parents like his. And
His mother had stood from the sofa. She wasnt smiling. Her face was smooth like glass.
She sat on the edge of the pool. Sometimes, when she wasnt doing important work for Grandma, she let Lute pick out her clothes and she wore whatever he chose. That day it was a sarong covered in a birds of paradise print and a necklace made of diamonds and conch pearls. She didnt remove either before she slid into the pool. The fabric of the sarong drifted around her legs as she walked toward him. Her eyes never left his.
She cupped his face in her hands. She leaned forward. Their noses were almost touching, but she didnt rub them together.
Lute, she said, you will never be chosen. You will never be an Avowed. You will never do any magic other than wordchains. Do you understand?
But, Mommy, everybody else
Say you understand.
Lute burst into sobs.
She held him while he cried. She held him every time he cried about it over the next couple of years.
Some disappointments were far too bitter to overcome in a single afternoon.
******
When Lute was six, his parents got divorced. It was a quiet finalization of something that had been in progress for an eternity by the reckoning of a young child.
His father had stopped living with them a few months after the fight Lute had overheard. When Jessica and Lute were on Libra, he was in the Velra mansion. When they were in the mansion, he was in Aulias apartment. When they were in the apartment, he was on Libra.
Lute visited him a lot, then a little less, then every other weekend.
After the divorce, he moved to a large apartment in a family neighborhood. How do you like my new place, Lutey? he asked when Lute came by for the first time. Youve got your own room! Its the biggest one!
He would continue to mention that Lute had the biggest bedroom for years, as if it was proof of his love, until finally, at twelve, Lute ended it for good by saying, Isnt that because Mom owns this apartment and she had the room with the en suite decorated for me?
Shed had a picture of a lutist installed on the shower wall in mosaic tile. Lutes monogram was carved into the beds footboard. It was crystal clear who she expected to sleep there.
At six, though, he was less jaded. He always looked forward to his weekends with his father. Jessica worked a lot. Cyril was never too busy to play. And there were so many other children in the family neighborhood!
Lute was used to being around adults mostly. Cousins similar in age were frequent visitors wherever he was, but they were never his visitors. If they were around, it was because their parents had brought them to see Grandma. Lute was expected to let them have their special time with Aulia without stealing any of her attention for himself.
We live with her, baby, said Jessica, when Lute complained about it. You get to see her more than any of them.
I dont like them.
None of them? Jessica asked.
They pretend like my pools belong to them.
Your pools?
Grandma said they were mine since I spent the most time in them.
Oh, I see Jessica smiled.
Lute thought about telling her the other thing about the cousins. The thing that had happened at the New Years partyhow in the childrens dining room, a whisper had gone around, and everyone had started speaking in Artonan.
They all took lessons in it. Hazel sometimes bragged that her father and her grandfatherLutes Uncle Corinspoke nothing but Artonan. Which wasnt true. They spoke English to everyone who wasnt her.
I dont speak Artonan, Lute had told the cousins. Im learning Mandarin instead.
Once hed learned Mandarin, his mother said he could choose his own third language. Anything he wanted. But not Artonan.
I spoke Artonan better than English when I was your age, Jessica had said. It was a lot of hard work, and all I had to show for it when all was said and done was a funny accent.
Sometimes, they still practiced wordchains together. When Lute asked. But his mother didnt seem to enjoy it, and Lute asked less and less.
Chainers did wordchains better. Somehow. Lute didnt quite understand how it worked. But he knew he would never be a Chainer. Even if he tried to grab that little bit of magic for himself, it would always be worse than what his own relatives could do.
And when Hazel and Grandma Aulia parted, Aulia always said, May the warmth of the Mother comfort you until we meet again.
When she said goodbye to Lute, it was only goodbye.
Could you all speak English so I can talk, too? hed asked the cousins at the party.
Theyd switched back, but not until Aunt Hikari and Uncle Benjamin came to check on them. By then, theyd been saying things Lute couldnt understand for five minutes.
Its not our fault you cant do it. We have to practice.
Yeah, Lute, we have to practice.
One day, were going to be Chainers.
Actually, only some of you will be, Hazel had informed them all when Hikari finally left. The Artonans dont have enough jobs for all of you. Even if Grandpa Corins office buys every single Chainer the System offers, some of you are going to have to be something else. Grandma Aulia told me so.
Grandma Aulia seemed to be telling Hazel more and more every day. Things she didnt tell Lute.
I dont like any of my cousins, Lute told his mother stubbornly. Except Aimi.
Well, Aimis too old to be your playmate. Shes my age.
Lute shook his head. She says shes sixteen.
Jessica had sighed through her nose. The rejuvenator made Aimi look and feel sixteen again recently. She thinks that being heavily tutored made her miss out on the teenage experience, so she decided to take her slot prematurely.
I understand," said Lute.
He didnt. And he still liked Aimi. One time, when the yacht was out sailing, shed shaken her butt in the direction of Apex and said, Look! Im mooning the moon!
That was enough reason to like someone, wasnt it?
******
Jessica Velra took her son into the city often, but they never went alone. Someone was always with them, usually several people. If it wasnt family members or crew members, it would be strangers dressed in clothes appropriate for whatever they were doing that day.
Our friends for this outing! Jessica would say, whenever she introduced Lute to a new entourage. Theyre going to help us get where were going and make sure we have a good time! Say thank you, Lute.
Lute always thanked them. He never minded having them along. They were all friendly, quiet people who wandered through markets and parks with him and his mom. They carried bags, held seats, and ran back for lost toys.
He assumed those things were their purpose in life, and everyone who went out on a sunny day must have some helpful seat holders and runners of their own. Even when he was visiting his dad, at least one of the helpers would appear if they ever left the family neighborhood.
One day, when they were getting ready to leave his grandmothers midtown apartment to go shopping, Cousin Orpheus wandered through the living room as Jessica was giving the quartet of helpers for that day their instructions. Lute was supposed to be practicing on the baby grand piano until the last possible minute, but he was easily distracted by the appearance of the one family member hed been told in no uncertain terms that he ought to avoid.
Is he a bad man? hed asked his mother when the instruction had been given.
No. But he has some troubles, Jessica had said.
Isnt he an S?
That only makes his troubles more troublesome for the rest of us, shed muttered.
Hazels older brother was getting harder to avoid, though. Hed started hanging around Grandma Aulia more often and actually using his cabin on Libra. Today he was in his underwear, scratching at the family tattoo on his ribs while he strolled around the living room, hunting for something. He checked inside boxes and behind books on the shelves. He looked under the leaves of a potted plant.
Orpheus, Jessica snapped. Im busy. None of your special medicine is hidden in this room anymore. Mother hired a sniffer to clean it out last week.
Orpheus yawned and scratched himself some more. He took in the days entourageall standing around Jessica in crisp polo shirts and ironed pantswith an amused look.
Cripes, Aunt Jess, he said. Are you afraid someones going to kidnap the squirt? If they did, where would they even take him? Its an island.
Jessica looked over at Lute, who went back to playing Gymnopdie 1 at a slightly too fast tempo.
Our friends will be helping us with our shopping, she said.
Orpheus laughed. Who hires four high-ranks to help with shopping at Rosa Grove Mall?
He left it there. The true purpose of the helpers might have remained mysterious for a long time after that, if not for his sister. She came over to spend the night a few days later.
It was an increasingly frequent event. And a miserable one in Lutes opinion. Hazel was almost two years older than him. And when she wasnt holed away with Grandma Aulia drinking milky tea out of painted cups and learning wordchains, she always came to find Lute and be a show-off.
He managed to avoid her for a whole day, night, and morning. But then on her second afternoon in residence, Aulia was called away to deal with something and Jessica went with her. Lute, sensing danger, was trying to pretend that he and the piano were very, very busy together.
But the thing about Hazel was that nobody was ever too busy for her to interrupt them. She would walk right up to the housekeeper while she was vacuuming and ask her to stop making so much noise. On Libra, she would bother Chef Kabir for grilled cheese with light butter even if he was in the middle of making lunch for everyone else onboard.
Lute wasnt allowed to do things like that. The other children in the family werent allowed to do things like that either.
Hazelwas different.
And it wasnt the bad kind of different, like Lute was.
She skipped toward the piano, her braid swinging, and she plinked a few keys at the highest octave, right in the middle of his song.
My Daddy can play the piano, she said. I asked if I could have lessons like you, and he said I wouldnt need them.
She told Lute this every time she heard him play.
Mrs. Yu says practice is important, said Lute.
The System will enhance my hearing, my pattern memorization, and my mantle dexterity when I get Chainer. So Daddy says Ill be able to play just about as well as anyone could want after Ive become an Avowed.
Lute thought mantle dexterity wasnt the right phrase, but he wasnt sure enough to argue with her and risk being wrong.
Mrs. Yu says
No. He wouldnt repeat it. No matter how mad she made him. This one thing, the thing a non-Avowed classical pianist had shared with him, he would keep to himself. So that Hazel couldnt find a way to ruin it.
He went quiet. He tried to ignore Hazels toneless plinking.
Grandma Aulia and Grandpa Corin took me to Artona I, said Hazel. They took me there to meet some verrry important people. So that I could show them what I can do.
All you do is have headaches.
Hazel bristled. Theyre not just headaches! Im sensitive!
She smacked the keys in front of her with a fist.
Lute already knew about the trip to Artona I. Everyone in the familymaybe everyone on Earthknew that Hazel had gone to meet verrry important people. It was all any of the aunts, uncles, and cousins could talk about. Some of them were excited. For some reason. Some of them were panicking. For some reason. Aulia had bought Hazel a brand new cell phone with a matching watch and a pair of hot pink glasses.
The display on the glasses mimicked a System interface. Hazel wanted Lute to ask to look through them.
Hed die first.
It was Avowed stuff anyway, and Avowed stuff wasnt for Lute. He didnt understand why everyone cared so much, and his mother said he didnt need to understand.
A lot of noise about a little girl, shed said. Thats all.
Youre supposed to leave me alone while Im practicing, Lute said.
It was a house rule, no matter which house he was in. Lutes music was just as important as everyone elses wordchain practice or their language lessons. His mother said so, and she enforced it.
Theyd even put a piano on Libra just for him.
What are you playing anyway? Hazel asked, leaning over to stare at his sheet music. Its so slow. It cant be hard.
Its just a song.
Gymnopdie 1 was his mothers favorite song. He was going to learn it as perfectly as he could. Mrs. Yu was helping him figure out how to modify it in the places where his fingers couldnt reach.
It doesnt matter if its slow or fast. You have to think about expression, Lute said.
Im about to turn nine, said Hazel. You should play Happy Birthday.
I just turned seven.
You didnt have a party.
Yes I did.
You didnt invite me!
Lute had invited his parents, his grandmother, Aimi, the crew, a kora player hed heard on the street a week before, and Mrs. Yu.
No. Other. Cousins.
He had been very specific about his guest list, and his mother hadnt argued. Aimi said she was surprised to be invited, but it was the best family party shed ever been to.
I didnt invite you because it was an adult birthday party, Lute said. I only invited grown-ups.
You still shouldve invited me. Were friends.
Lute missed a note. And then another.
Were friends? Were they friends?
Friends are supposed to be nice to each other. Youre not nice, he said.
Hazel plinked a few more keys. Im nice to you. Youre just too little and dumb to understand. I look out for you all the time.
You dont look out for me! Lute said angrily.
Kids, dont fight in there! a womans voice called from the another room. The housekeeper was spending an awful long time cleaning the bathroom today. Lute was sure she was just avoiding Hazel.
Youre rude and you bother me when Im practicing, Lute hissed. And you never do anything but brag. Youre not my friend, and youre not nice.
I dont brag! Hazel glared at him. And I am nice! There are all kinds of things I know about you and Aunt Jessica but I dont say them just to be nice!
Liar!
Hazels eyes narrowed. Her voice lowered to a whisper. Orpheus says youre not allowed out of the house without S-ranks around, and my Daddy says its just because Aunt Jessica wants to make sure nobody says anything about you.
Lute stopped even trying to play the song. What does that mean?
Hazel gave him a superior look. Youre both whiffs, and so people might say mean things around you. Aunt Jessica takes guards so that those people will be scared to do it where you can hear them.
Were not whiffs!
Yes you are.
No were not!
Stupid. I bet you dont even know what it means. Thats what its called when youre supposed to be Avowed and you arent.
Youre making that up!
Hazel pulled out her phone. Ive known about you forever. And I dont say anything because Im supposed to be nice to you and not make trouble for Grandma Aulia.
Lute was breathing hard.
Here, Ill prove it. I found this the other day when they were talking about your guards. My new phone doesnt have little kid settings like my old one because when I went to Artona, I proved I was responsible. I can find anything now. Im typing in What mean things do people say about whiffs?
A minute later, she whipped off her new glasses and shoved them onto Lutes face.
They were too big. He had to hold them in place with his hand. He didnt want to. He wanted to take them and throw them across the room. But the lights in his eyesthe possibility that Hazel wasnt lying and she really knew things about him he didnther new phone was a grown-up phone?
Are they saying bad things about us? Do Hazels parents tell her secrets about us? What kinds of things are on grown-up phones?
Lute didnt have a phone at all. His mother said he didnt need things like that at his age.
This one, said Hazel. Look. Its a board where just people from here on Anesidora go to talk.
A board?
A place online, Hazel said. Ill read it to you since you probably cant.
I can read!
Hazel ignored him. Someone says, Im seventeen already. What am I going to do if Im a whiff?
Lute could read the words himself. They were blazing in his eyes. He couldnt read them quite as fast as Hazel was, but he could tell she wasnt lying.
And then the next person says, You need to start praying, but that ones not important. The one after that says, My dads so nasty. He loves all the mean whiff jokes. Then he writes some out.
She read them all aloud to him one by one. It took her several minutes to finish the list and explain what they all meant.
Then she took her glasses back and stared into Lutes wide eyes. See? Thats the kind of thing people say about you and your parents. And I knew. And I didnt tell you. Because Im nice to you.
She spent the next two hours trying to force him to stop crying. She failed.
He hid in his room and sobbed until he was exhausted, and when his mother woke him up, he burst into fresh tears. He was so inconsolable that even his grandmother got involved, and the whole story was pried out of him between blown noses and hiccups.
Hazels parents and her grandparents were called, and there was a meeting in Aulias office that Lute was not privy to. But she lost her phone, her glasses, and her watch. She gained two additional tutors and a uniformed nanny who traveled with her everywhere for the next year, so that she was never left to her own devices, even on weekends.
It would be a while before she and Lute were alone in a room together again.
Apparently Aulias tolerance did have a limit. And that limit was Hazel explaining a joke about how whiff was the sound a tissue shouldve made as it entered the trashcan.
because it wouldve been better if the sperm went there instead of in the whiffs mom.
Later, Lute would decide Hazel was lucky Jessica hadnt thrown her off the yacht when nobody was looking.
Up until then, his questions about how babies were made had been answered with very sweet euphemisms about two people creating a new life out of love. In a world so full of magic, that kind of explanation could make sense for a long time. The entrance of sperm cells and trashcans into the story, forced his mother to have many long conversations with him about delicate family matters.
For example, Jessica came from Aulia and a man who preferred to remain anonymous and uninvolved, as a couple of other high profile donors did with their Velra offspring. She had also been genetically engineered to an extent that was illegal on Anesidora. Even on the island, an ethical committee usually would have prevented the creation, for aesthetic reasons, of someone who looked so significantly different from both the average human and her own parents.
Am I short because the scientists made me that way?
No, said Jessica. Youre short because Mommy is short. There were no scientists involved in making you. Just me and your father.
Another delicate family matterHazels Mommy and Daddy hadnt made her by themselves. Cousin Hugh was an A-rank and his first wife was an S-rank, and theyd made Orpheus, who was also an S. Then Cousin Hugh married Cady, who was only a C-rank, but she wanted an S baby like the first wife had made. So a Hazel egg had come from Aulia. And a Hazel sperm had come from a hyperbole named Sonde.
I see, said Lute, after this had all been explained slowly.
Do you? Jessica asked hesitantly.
Hazel has four parents.
Thats right.
Two sperms and two eggs, and Cady carried them all around for nine months.
Jessica sighed. Lets go get some grapes from the fridge, and then Ill try this again.
Eventually, it was all unraveled. Including the fascinating news that Aunt Hikari had been married to Uncle Corin before she switched over to his brother, Uncle Benjamin.
Lute pondered it for a while, then nodded. That was a good decision. Uncle Corin never thinks about anything but Hazel. Aunt Hikari would be bored.
******
Lute recovered quickly from the shock of having the birds and the bees, and the Avowed version of the birds and the bees, explained to him all at once. It just became background information, like everything else about his multitudinous relations. But he had a harder time getting over the jokes.
They stuck in his head.
They were there when he went to sleep at night. And when he went out with the bodyguards. They were there whenever grown-ups whispered something over his head or when the cousins looked at him and snickered.
Are they talking about me? Are they saying those things about me? Are they being mean to me and my parents?
Worst of all, the jokes were there when he played the piano.
What is this, baby? Jessica asked a week after the incident, sitting down on the bench beside him and stroking his head. The sheet music for Gymnopdie 1 was in front of him. Hed been trying to read it through the angry red scrawls hed made across it with a crayon yesterday. You usually enjoy practice. You can play another song if you want.
I dont like the piano, Lute said quietly.
His mother stared at the sheet music for a while. Maybe a little break, she said. How about you take a few days off?
He did.
A few days turned into a few more days. When he yielded to practice again, he could hear himself hating the notes. He had been learning piano since he was three. Hed never hated the notes before.
Mrs. Yu and his mother eventually had a meeting. The next day, Jessica took him to a concert. The day after that, she took him to see a string quartet.
A jazz band. A xylophonist. The kora player again. They started having mother/son brunches at places with live musicpiano, violin, cello, saxophone, pipa.
Lute became aware that they were instrument shopping, but he was having so much fun he saw no reason to resist the project.
What about that man who plays bagpipes on his sailboat? he asked hopefully as they left a restaurant with a sitar player.
Bagpipes? Jessica said with an alarmed look. Oh yes. Those are so exciting. And loudI think the bagpipe man might be busy this month.
If the bagpipe man hadnt been busy that month, who knew what might have happened?
As it was, Lute found the harp.
The sound was mesmerizing. There were so many different types and sizes. And the big ones were so big.
They were special, and he felt special when he held one.
That was a feeling that was growing harder and harder to find, so he clung to it. And he played until his fingers blistered.
The story has been illicitly taken; should you find it on Amazon, report the infringement.
*
Updat𝓮d from freew𝒆bnovel(.)com