As I slipped into the world of dreams once again, it was like sinking into a sea of shadows.
I was adrift on the currents of unconsciousness, knowing that I was dreaming but unable to interact, unable to wake.
It was a familiar sensation now, this lucidity. I was a ghost, an observer to a story that was not my own.
In my dream, I was in a dimly lit room.
Books were strewn across the floor, charts and diagrams filled the walls, and a hunched figure sat in the corner, his face lit by the harsh glow of a desk lamp.
It was a young man, lost in thought, brows furrowed in deep concentration.
I could see his frustration, a palpable aura of disappointment and dissatisfaction that hung over him like a dark cloud.
His friends and allies came and went, trying to offer words of encouragement, of solace. But he would only shake his head, a grim smile etched onto his features.
"Impossible..." he muttered, his voice barely a whisper. "You don't understand... none of you do."
There was a certain stubbornness in his eyes, a spark of determination that belied his words. He was a man chasing a dream, a dream that seemed tantalizingly out of reach.
It finally drove him to isolation.
The man locked himself in his workshop, shrugging off any attempt to pull him out of his solitude.
He muttered to himself, his voice filled with an anguish that echoed off the stone walls.
"They don't understand... they don't know what it's like," he growled, his voice filled with an indescribable despair.
"To want something... to need it... and to know you can never have it."
I watched as he buried himself in his work, a man consumed by his dreams and ambitions.
The world around him ceased to exist, the only reality that mattered was the one he was trying to create.
As I watched him, I felt a pang of sympathy, an echo of his despair. I knew what it felt like to chase a dream, to strive for something seemingly unattainable.
But… there was something about this man that felt both odd and similar.
"All… I want it all…" He whispered.
All of what?
"My dream… I made a vow that day…"
Was he referring to the day I thought he was? The day he proclaimed he would be the Great Sage?
"Yes… that day…" As if reading my thoughts, the man muttered.
"I promised everyone… I promised myself… that I would do it!"
Do what? What was the thing that drove this man to this state?
" I… I would make sure no one knows Magic more than I do!"
My eyes bulged as I remembered the same words I had uttered as a child. He was referring to that, just as I thought.
"But I can't do it! Not as I am now! Not as long as I am Inept! Not as long as I am mortal! Not as long as I am limited!"
What was he implying? As the Great Sage, I studied all the Magic in my lifetime. I made sure I understood it more than my peers, and even revolutionalized it.
As the Great Sage, even though I was Inept… I achieved all that.
Surely this man could do the same.
"No! It's not enough!" As if responding to me, the man responded in anger and frustration.
"I can't understand Magic the way those who have Magic can understand it. That feeling... I'll never have it."
Well, that was true, but—
"I'll die one day. When I die… someone will surpass me. They'll find out and know things I don't. No… that can't be. I want to know it all. I… it's driving me crazy!"
The man aged, still clinging onto this maddening position. He developed more theories, went on many adventures, and achieved many things.
But… he wasn't able to reach the impossible height he wanted.
"I want it all! All knowledge! Why can't I reach it? What am I lacking? I put in all this effort… I dedicated my whole life… and yet…"
Despair had taken over this man at this point.
He was unrecognizable from the bright past self he once was. Now he was ragged, having full beards and unkempt clothes.
His obsessive eyes scoured the dark room he occupied… his workshop.
"Ah, that's right. Haha… why didn't I think of this before?" He suddenly began to chuckle to himself.
"Why didn't I realize it sooner? I was wrong. All this time… I've been so WRONG!"
Insane cackles of laughter echoed throughout the room as he slowly came to a realization. My body trembled as I heard them.
The conclusion I arrived at.
"It's Magic. I need it. I need to have it! Why didn't I see it sooner? To obtain all the knowledge… I NEED Magic!"
I watched as the man rose, his eyes hollow and his eyes widening like that of a horrifying monster.
My heart raced and the darkness slowly began to eat away at my dream, scaring me greatly. Before I knew it, everything was consumed by it.
And then I heard the final whispers that emanated from the lone shadow in the room.
"That's the answer!"
The dream began to fade, the edges of my consciousness blurring.
His mutters were the last sounds I heard as the dreamworld dissolved around me, returning me to the waking world with a sense of both sadness and a dark foreboding of what was about to happen.
However…
"H-huh? What was that dream?"
… The moment I awoke, I couldn't remember the details of the dream I just had.
I couldn't even remember a single word that was uttered.
It had all vanished into darkness, leaving me standing alone in a shattering dimension, with the Arcana I sought in my grasp.
"Strange…" I whispered, looking around me to see nothing at all.
"Vey strange."
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[A/N]
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