Chapter 150: Because You Want to Protect Yourself
Scared?
Freya reflexively asked, But didnt you just say Im very happy?
Joy and fear can coexist, Adela replied, Ive seen many people like this in the Casinos betting games. They get a great hand, so theyre excited and happy because they can win. But they also worry that the opponent may have a better hand, so their worry and fear dont dissipate.
Joy comes from what you have, and fear comes from the possibility of the opponent taking it away at any moment. Freya, who are you betting with, and what exactly are you betting on?
Anyway, this class is so boring. Instead of talking to a therapist, why not talk to me? I wont even charge you.
Freya hesitated, Generally speaking, if one seeks psychotherapy, they should find a therapist who has no relation to their personal life
Yes. Adela propped her chin, gazing at Freyas beautiful face, But youre clearly so happy, yet your eyes send out save me distress signals. I just cant turn a blind eye to it.
Freya gently touched her own face, lost in thought for a moment.
Adela didnt rush her, waiting quietly by her side.
The sunshine was good today, and the teachers lecture was very hypnotic.
In such a peaceful daily routine, Freya seemed out of place.
Because she was exuding a sense of happiness that Adela had never seen before.
Even when Adela saw a gambler turn the tables in the Casino and repay his gambling debts, avoiding a life of digging as a mechanized miner, he wasnt as happy as Freya.
Even the students who got into the Red Mist Research Institute as postgraduates werent as relaxed as Freya.
Even successful entrepreneurs, sorcerers, professors, and scholars werent as content as Freya.
It was just too dazzling.
It even made Adela feel a bit disgusted, to the point of wanting to throw up.
After a long silence, Freya finally spoke, I know a Bewitcher
Oh, hahaha, okay, keep going. Adela could barely hold back her laughter.
Freya glared at Adela and continued, She recently met a man for some special reasons
Because of the contract, Freya couldnt expose Ashes identity, appearance, or the fact that he lived in her apartment, but she could still share the information after disguising the details. For example, their nights spent together could be described as staying overnight at a motel; their dinners together could be described as Freya going to Ashes house for dinner
After recounting the fragments of their days together, Freya finally revealed her inexplicable feelings, I now both like and dislike him, both want to approach him and stay away from him, I feel like I might be sick
Isnt this easy to understand? Adela laughed, The Bewitcher is in love with him.
No, absolutely not. Freya shook her head, Ive been in love before. Love is closeness, embrace, greed, demand. How can it involve disgust or distancing?
Adela said, There are many forms of love, or rather, love can have many purposes. The kind of love you are used to, Freya, is born from physical attraction, its fiery just to satisfy desires. When you encounter a more attractive person, your love will shift accordingly. For you, this kind of love is replaceable.
But what this man offers to the Bewitcher is not just fleeting desire, but the joy of mutual understanding, daily companionship, and soul connection. You may encounter many more attractive people in the future, but there may be only one such interesting soul.
This is why Bewitcher despises this love and even tries to distance herself from ithes irreplaceable. Whats more terrifying is that he has gradually integrated into Bewitchers life, like a poison seeping deep into the marrow, impossible to be removed by any means.
What a wicked man. He brought Bewitcher into his life, so her life was also intruded by him; he wanted to understand Bewitcher, so Bewitcher also wanted to understand him; he was dependent on Bewitcher, so Bewitcher also came to depend on him.
Perhaps only a man who completely gives up his dignity, independence, and privacy would act like this. Even if he received the most basic moral education in the Foster Home, he wouldnt stoop so low. Adela shook her head: Its astonishing that such a shameless man still exists these days, and he successfully bewitched Bewitcher. Bewitcher is really unfortunate.
Freya listened in confusion, subconsciously asking, What should I do then?
Follow your instincts, detest him, stay away from him. Adela said softly, If this continues, you will only sink deeper into the increasingly intense affection, becoming someone you no longer recognize. What will bind you then is not just the man, but also all the past youve invested in him.
Youve heard it many times in the Foster Home, havent you? All relationships that make you worry will contaminate you, All relationships that make you feel wronged will harm you, All relationships that make you change will dominate you. Everything that man does is contaminating you, harming you, dominating you.
Adela grabbed Freyas hand, Weve received so much education, not to lose ourselves. We were born for ourselves, and only for ourselves, with no room to accommodate others.
Do you still remember the main connotation of the Bloodline Prohibition Law?
Freya murmured, Its personal freedom
Thats right, personal freedom. Because after the Bloodline Prohibition, families no longer exist, and kinship and love no longer have a foundation to stand on. Everyone has severed all societal shackles, hence the freedom of personality.
Perhaps you value him highly right now, but thats just a misunderstanding. Next year, next month, tomorrow, or even the next second, you could have new thoughts, like new people, or want to live a new life.
This is not only for your own sake, but also for the other party, as humans are far more changeable than Bewitcher.
Think about it, what if the other party suddenly has new thoughts and chooses to leave you? How would you feel?
Thinking about the short shelf life left, Freya suddenly felt breathless and struggled to say, I would feel terrible.
Just knowing him for a short while has upset you. If you knew him for months, years, would you distort yourself and ingratiate him to keep him?
Youve anticipated this possibility, youre worried about this future, thats why youre so uneasy, thats why you want to distance yourself from him.
Because you want to protect yourself. Even if its a marshmallow, youre still afraid of being hurt.
Looking at Freyas increasingly pitiful expression, Adela whispered in her ear, We dont need irreplaceable love.
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