"I am, indeed, holding back."
Cosette opened her mouth, only to close them again. She felt something off from Asher's last remarks, and when she was certain there was a different meaning behind his words, she slapped his shoulder aggressively.
"Don't even think about it, Asher Quinn!" she warned.
Asher's brows rose. "Think about what?"
"Me." She pointed at herself and then at him. "You and me! Nope!"
"Haha… what are you saying?" Asher looked at her with ridicule. "Do you think you're my type?"
"I'm not?" her expression suddenly stiffened, almost cracking him up. "Really?"
"Don't worry. I don't like you." He shook his head, but somehow, his remarks tickled her curiosity.
In the past, Cosette had tried to seduce this guy for fun. Actually, it wasn't real seduction, but more like she enjoyed teasing him. What was written in the novel — Cosette had almost forgotten about it — but her interaction with Asher there happened; the teasing, the real attraction, and everything.
She would've liked him very much if not for the fact she was deeply and madly in love with Maxen. Asher was also very in love with Mia. That poor girl… now that Cosette recalled what happened, she couldn't help but feel the guilt creeping into her heart.
"You really don't like me?" she asked out of plain curiosity.
Asher slowed down until the golf cart came to a full halt. His hand on the steering wheel remained, and he kept his eyes ahead for the next several seconds. His expression had turned solemn, fluttering his thick eyelashes slowly at her.
"Should I like you?" he returned, but the usual sarcasm in his tone was nowhere to be heard.
"No…"
"And why is that?"
"Because… why would you like me?" she tilted her head to the side, eyes full of curiosity. "Do you think you like me?"
"What if I do? And what if I don't?"
"Don't." Cosette leaned back and looked ahead. "Don't like me."
Asher let out a dry laugh, unable to discern which emotion that was circling in his heart. All he could be certain of was that whatever emotion he felt at her remarks left this sour and bitter tang in his mouth.
"Your brother likes me, and even though he had lied low, it'll only bring trouble. It won't benefit anyone."
"You… do you know the more you restrict someone, the more their desire grows stronger?" Asher waited for her to look back at him. "Don't tell me not to like you or that the two of us are impossible. It only triggers me and makes me want to prove you wrong."
"Then that's the more reason you know you shouldn't entertain such emotion, don't you think?" Cosette held his gaze, unfaltering. "This growing interest… is not anywhere near love. It's simply a desire to make a point. Don't use me to make a point, Your Master Quinn. Cut both of us some slack."
Silence descended between the two of them as the wind whispered in their ears. They kept their eyes on each other, both showing the solid determination of their point, unwilling to back down or compromise.
"You don't want me to like you because of Luke? Or was it because of that guy?" Asher broke the prolonged silence, peeling his eyes from her, and looked ahead.
"Max has a name, and it's because of both of them."
"Forget about that Maxen." His eyelids drooped, gripping the steering wheel tightly. Although his surface was calm, his feelings were in disarray. "But why do I have to stop myself from pursuing something because of Luke?"
"What?"
"All my life, I had sacrificed myself so my little brother doesn't have to suffer from the pressure and expectation from the elders," explained Asher to Cosette, giving her a quick review of his disposition. "Even when there was no recognition or appreciation, I did it because he is my brother. Luke might always act spoiled, but he is very important to me. For as long as he is fine, I don't mind what I have to do for him to keep living the life he wanted."
He slowly set his eyes back to her, and this time, he didn't conceal the bitterness and confusion that was plastered across his face.
"Are you telling me Luke wouldn't take a step back or fight with me fairly if I finally want something… or someone that he also fancies?" he continued with deep bafflement in his voice. "Should I just give up without even trying for his sake? Again?"
Cosette held her breath, unable to look away from him. Her lips opened and closed, but her voice wouldn't come out.
How was she supposed to answer that? When Asher was making a strong point here. She couldn't just tell him to give way to his little brother when Asher had always let Luke have it his way. This matter wasn't completely about Cosette or both brothers liking her to the point they would fight each other until someone shed blood.
This was about whether the brothers were willing to have a give-and-take situation. Because right now, Asher believed it had always been a give-situation without him getting anything in return. This might be true to a certain degree.
"Is this desire even more important than your relationship with your brother?" she breathed out when she recovered her voice.
"I don't know, Miss Blac. If only I do, we're not having this conversation." Asher shook his head mildly. "Do you think I am being selfish right now?"
Cosette pursed her lips and shook her head.
"No," she said, looking away from him. "Strangely enough, I don't think that's being selfish. I think you have a point, and it rather leaves me confused about how to convince you not to nurture whatever you feel about me."
"I can only offer friendship to you and to Luke — perhaps, to Ezekiel Stone as well," she continued solemnly. "Someone already has a good hold on my heart, and I don't see anyone else in the future except him."
Cosette lowered her eyes, staying honest with him even though she knew Asher might not be lying when he said he didn't like her. It was better to draw a clear line before any feelings would develop because it seemed she would have more encounters with him in the following months and in the future.
Asher stared at her side profile in silence before he also looked ahead. Both of them stayed silent as they simply looked ahead, sinking deep into their own thoughts, until Ezekiel caught up to them and disrupted their train of thoughts.
The source of this c𝐨ntent is fre𝒆w(e)bn(o)vel