Chapter 723 Learning On The Job
After spending some time with the girls, Jade glanced at her phone to check the time and when she saw that it was getting late she stuck her tongue in her cheek as she thought about the most unsuspicious way to excuse herself so she could go prepare for the night.
She had been keeping her eyes on the passageway the whole time to make sure Harry hasn't gone into the bedroom before her.
She planned to have showered and changed into her sexy lingerie before Harry walks into the room. She wanted to be under the duvet so he wouldn't know what was coming for him.
Jade looked up to meet Sonia's amused gaze and Sonia grinned knowingly as though she could read Jade's mind, "I think we should call it a night, I'm exhausted," Sonia said with a false yawn as she rose to stretch, and Jade flashed her a smile of gratitude.
"Yeah, me too," Jade said as she also stood up.
"Alright, I think we have covered enough for the night anyway. I will go through and organize all we have discussed and send the details to the group chat so we can all have them," Lucy said and Jade nodded.
"If that's all I beg to take my leave. Good night ladies. Talk to you tomorrow," Jade said as she hurried away.
"Why is she in such a hurry?" Candace asked in confusion.
"I have no idea," Sonia said with a shake of her head.
"So, are you girls ready to go in now?" Sonia asked, looking at Lucy.
"If you are not too tired I would love us to chat for a bit before you go in," Candace said to Lucy before she could respond to Sonia.
"Sure. I guess I'm not going in now. You should get some rest," Lucy said and Sonia regretted lying that she had been tired.
She would have loved to hangout some more with them before going inside since she knew that Bryan was still downstairs with the guys.
Perhaps she could use the time alone to to work on her story, Sonia reasoned as she bid them goodnight and headed for her bedroom.
"So, how are you?" Candace asked curiously, and Lucy shrugged.
"I'm fine. How are you?" Lucy asked in return.
"I'm alright. I've been wondering how you've been coping with this whole family drama. I saw the comments online before they were taken down," Candace said and Lucy sighed deeply.
"What can I do? I have to find a way to cope, right? It's either that or walk away," She said and Candace nodded.
"I guess so."
"If you were so curious to know how I was doing why didn't you call?" Lucy asked and Candace shrugged.
"I find calls awkward. Especially as we are not all that close yet," she explained honestly.
"What about a text?" Lucy asked and she shook her head.
"I think I prefer seeing your face while talking to you. Texts can be too impersonal some times. And asking such questions over the phone might just sound like I'm being curious because I want to gossip and not because I actually care," Candace said and Lucy laughed softly.
"I guess you're right."
"I suppose you've been able to resolve the other issue with Evelyn?" Candace asked since she had been there at Tom's house the night everything went crazy.
"Yes. I guess we can say it ended in a sort of stalemate. For peace to reign we all decided to move past the meddling issue. Evelyn will try to meddle less, and I will try to be more understanding. My therapist said I have to learn to be more tolerant," Lucy explained and Candace smiled.
"I suppose that's fair. I hope I never have issues like this with Jamal's girlfriend when the time comes," Candace said and Lucy smiled.
"What do you think about all of it?" She asked and Candace shook her head.
"I don't think I have enough information on the subject to have an opinion," Candace said even though Jade had told her what transpired that night.
She knew that Jade had told her everything from her mother's perspective and not exactly from Lucy's perspective.
Lucy went on to tell her about everything that happened both back in Ludus and since they got to the Hank family house and exactly how she had reacted and why she had reacted that way. By the time she was done, Candace sighed.
"There are actually no rights or wrongs. It all depends on perspective. As a mother, I understand Evelyn, but I also understand you. While you can't entirely stop a mother from meddling or interfering in her child's life, you can call her to order when it becomes too much or detrimental to your relationship. If I were Evelyn, I would worry about Tom and want to talk to someone about him not wanting to get married when it's something he has always wanted. I would talk to someone I think Tom might listen to. It's just like me talking to my dad about Jamal. It's pretty normal, isn't? That's what she did in this case. We can't blame her for the way her father-in-law handled it," Candace said and Lucy nodded.
"And the way I handled it?" Lucy asked and Candace shrugged.
"I'm not saying her meddling or interfering is okay, but maybe next time you should let Tom handle stuff like that with his family while you stay neutral. It will save you a lot of unnecessary stress and drama," Candace advised and Lucy nodded.
"Yeah. I learned that from experience already. Going forward, if Tom doesn't handle an issue, I won't let it bother me either," Lucy said and Candace smiled.
"If I may ask, is there any particular reason you don't want to marry him? I know it's not my business so you don't have to answer me if you don't want to," Candace said and Lucy considered it for a moment.
Well, maybe it wouldn't be so bad talking to someone else other than Sonia about her life. Candace was her cousin after all.
"Well, I never wanted to get married or even be in a relationship long before I met Tom. So, the decision was not about Tom. It was about me," Lucy said with a shrug.
"Well, if that's the case, then don't you think it's possible you might be able to reconsider your decision? I mean, you made it before meeting him, don't you love him enough to change your mind?" Candace asked and Lucy smiled.
"I do, and to be honest with you, I have changed my mind on it. Although he doesn't know about it yet. I've told only Sonia about it," Lucy said and Candace beamed a happy smile.
"Really? You are going to marry him?" Candace asked in a whisper as though scared that someone else might hear them.
Lucy giggled, "Why do you look so happy about it?"
"Apart from the fact that you both look so good together and I think you'd be wonderful partners and parents? You two deserve to spend a lifetime of marital bliss together, and Jamal adores you both," Candace said and Lucy smiled.
"Do you really think I'd be a good mom?" Lucy asked and Candace looked at her incredulously.
"If anyone has what it takes to be a great mom between the both of us, I'd say it is you," Candace said and Lucy giggled.
"That can't be true. You've done such a wonderful job with Jamal. I can't even compare myself with you," she said and Candace looked at her with serious eyes.
"I mean it, Lu. This isn't me flattering you. I didn't have a functional home like you. What am I saying? I didn't have a home whether functional or dysfunctional. I was raised in the orphanage along with so many other kids. Motherly love isn't something I experienced. If you think with such a background I did such a good job, don't you think you'd do an even better job with your background? I chose to have a child with such a terrible man like Jero. A pathetic excuse for a father. You have Tom. A wonderful father figure. So far I've lived a life that would make Jamal ashamed. Being a stripper and all. Look at you. You've got a degree, a wonderful job and you've done so well for yourself…."
"I don't think those things count. I think being a mother comes naturally. You know, like an instinct," Lucy said and Candace shook her head.
"And I know you have it. I do not doubt that if you were in danger with Jamal you'd protect him with your life. It all counts, Lucy. Do you have any idea how traumatized Jamal is because of Jero? If I were such a great mother I would have thought of my child before getting involved with Jero. And that's what you're doing. Look how worried you are about being a good mother to a child you haven't even conceived yet. That's what motherhood is about. You constantly worry," Candace said, holding Lucy's gaze.
After a moment Lucy sighed, "Maybe you have a point. I met a lady during my outing with Jamal and she said something similar. I don't know, Candace. I'm scared," Lucy said and Candace took her hand.
"What exactly are you scared of?" Candace asked and Lucy took a deep breath.
"Even if I'm an adult now and I understand better that I didn't handle things well as I should have and it led to my abduction, a part of me still blames my parents. I think they were not attentive enough. What if I don't pay enough attention to my kids?" She asked and Candace smiled.
"I think you will. You know why? Your experience has taught you to not take things for granted. There is nothing to be scared of. Yes, you'd probably make a couple of mistakes along the line, but that makes you human. You'd be fine. Ever heard the saying that it takes a community to raise a child? You have a solid community behind you. You have all of us to support you, and most importantly you have a wonderful partner. I think you would do great," Candace said confidently as she squeezed her hand, and Lucy took a deep breath.
"That is so reassuring. Thanks," Lucy said, making up her mind to go for it.
Tom wanted kids, and she wanted to have Tom's kids too. The only thing standing between her and doing it was her fear of not being a good mother, and after hearing from Sonia, Mary at the park, and Candace she was feeling more confident that maybe she had what it would take to do it. And most especially she had Tom.
"There is no reason to thank me. I'm glad you could talk to me about it," Candace said and Lucy smiled.
"Me too."
"By the way, about Dawn's mom, I really think you shouldn't get involved with her," Candace said and Lucy nodded.
"I blocked her already after my conversation with Tom earlier. I only brought it up because I was hoping one of you girls would help me reach out to her. But since you all are wary of her, it's cool. It's not like I owe her friendship or anything anyway. I'm already doing my best looking out for Dawn after all," Lucy said and Candace nodded in approval.
"Do you mind me asking how things are going with you and Matt?" Lucy asked and Candace smiled.
"As long as I trust you to keep it between us, I actually don't mind you asking," Candace said and went on to tell Lucy all about her relationship with Matt, their misunderstanding and how Matt was acting now.
"What do you think?" Candace asked when she was done.
"I think it serves you right," Lucy said and Candace raised a brow.
"Really?"
"Yeah! He has been so sweet and all chasing you, and since you've shown him you don't want or appreciate that, I think it's okay for him to step back and let you set the pace as you deem fit," Lucy said with a shrug and Candace sighed.
"But I apologized."
"Well, apologies don't always take back the hurt, does it?" Lucy asked and Candace sighed again.
"To be honest, I really don't know what I'm doing. A part of me thinks I'm not ready yet for a relationship, but at the same time I don't want to lose him," Candace said and Lucy smiled.
"I understand that very well. I've felt that way about Tom too. I think you should do what makes you happy. If being with him makes you happy, go for it, and get ready while in it. As long as he doesn't mind, I'm sure you can be with him while working on yourself. You don't need to be perfect to be in a relationship. It's like learning on the job," Lucy said thinking about herself and Tom.
She knew that was what she was doing with Tom. She was learning on the job, and she was thankful that Tom was so understanding and patient with her.
"Learning on the job," Candace repeated with a small smile.
"Yeah. Let's not throw away something good because of our fear of the unknown," Lucy said and Candace nodded.
"You are right. Well, if he wants to be chased, I'd just put on my running shoes," Candace said and Lucy giggled.
"Yeah. You do that. Now all I have to do is figure out when, where, and how to tell Tom that I'd love to marry him and have his kids," Lucy said with resolve and Candace smiled happily.
"I would love to see the joy on his face when you do that," Candace said and Lucy grinned as she tried to imagine Tom's reaction.
"Me too. I would love to see that too," Lucy said with a nod.
"I'm glad I had this conversation with you, Candace. It's like you were the missing piece I needed to complete the puzzle on my mind and come to a decision," Lucy said and Candace smiled.
"We should have such heart to heart talks more often," Candace suggested and Lucy nodded in agreement.
"Absolutely. But how do we do that from the distance when you find calls to be awkward?" Lucy asked and Candace grinned.
"I don't think phone calls with you will be so awkward now," Candace said and they both laughed.
"Wow! I can't believe we have been talking for an hour already," Lucy said when she glanced at the time on her phone.
"I can believe it," Candace said with a small smile which Lucy returned.
They both knew they had crossed a line in their relationship and had bonded over the last hour.
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