Chapter 438: Chapter 435: Why Didn’t You Say So Earlier?
You’re expecting... you’re expecting... expecting... pecting... ing.
Mo Qi’s voice echoed across the island. A cool breeze drifted by, but an even deeper chill settled in everyone’s hearts.
Congratulations my ass!
Was this something to be congratulated for?
And they’d been knocked up by a pig!
If word of this got out, how could they ever show their faces in public again?
Especially the men. How were they supposed to describe their current condition?
’Am I a father or a mother now?’
’If I really give birth to this... thing, what am I supposed to call myself?’
’Mom? That doesn’t seem right.’
’Dad? That doesn’t feel very accurate either.’
’Most importantly, how am I supposed to explain to the kid how it came into being?’
’Am I supposed to tell it that its existence is all because I happened to glance at a pig in a crowd?’
’What would the child think?’
Just as the powerful Immortals were wrestling with their complicated feelings, Huangfu Zhong, who had been through this once before, spoke up.
"Everyone, don’t panic! This is that pig’s Demon Technique. We may appear to be pregnant, but they’re actually all stillbirths in our wombs!"
"To resolve this, the fastest and most effective method is to remove the stillborn fetus!"
As he spoke, Huangfu Zhong’s blade flashed, and he sliced open his own belly for the second time.
A vaguely humanoid mass of blood and gore slid out from his abdomen.
Immortal Power surged, and the wound closed on its own.
Huangfu Zhong’s face was deathly pale. He quickly swallowed a highly restorative Elixir.
Two pregnancies and caesarean sections in such a short period... even for an Immortal, it was becoming too much to bear.
The other Immortals all frowned. Although they had witnessed this once before, they never imagined it would happen to them.
’Do we really have to perform C-sections on ourselves?’
They all looked at one another, reluctance written plainly on their faces.
Five hundred Immortals performing a mass C-section... More than half of them were old men and women with white hair but youthful faces. The mental image was too horrifying to contemplate.
But if they didn’t, the abdominal pain was unbearable, and the thing inside was bound to come out sooner or later.
The female Cultivators had it slightly better; at least they had a natural exit. But what were the male Cultivators supposed to do?
"Everyone, listen to me! As the saying goes, it’s better to suffer a short, sharp pain than a long, dull one. Rather than waste time waiting for nothing, let’s just get this over with so we can have our revenge!"
Huangfu Zhong said, dragging his weakened body and shooting a hateful glare at Mo Qi and the Pig Emperor.
"Are you all really content to be tricked and toyed with by a junior, letting him stand by and watch you make fools of yourselves?"
Who among those that had reached the Immortal Realm was a simple person?
Stirred by Huangfu Zhong’s words, many of them stopped hesitating. One by one, they took out daggers and sliced into their own bellies.
For a moment, the sound of sharp blades tearing through flesh rose and fell, one after another.
Just as more people were about to join the "C-section" army, Mo Qi cleared his throat.
"Ahem, um... what I was trying to say is, I have a way to remove those foreign objects from your bodies. You don’t have to give birth, and you definitely don’t need a C-section."
Everyone: "..."
CLANG! CLATTER!
Daggers clattered to the ground as the crowd of Immortals stood frozen, as if turned to stone.
’No C-section necessary?’
’He can just remove them directly?!’
’Holy shit! Why didn’t you say so earlier!’
The Immortals who had already cut open their bellies were dumbfounded.
They were so frustrated they wanted to cry but had no tears, feeling the urge to just slap themselves twice.
’What the hell was this?’
’Why did I have to be so damn quick!’
The Immortals who hadn’t yet acted all wiped the cold sweat from their brows.
They were secretly relieved they had hesitated. Otherwise, the reputation of having been pregnant and given birth would have been set in stone!
This was especially true for the male Cultivators. If they could avoid giving birth, they would naturally do so at any cost.
Otherwise, if they were to fight someone in the future, their opponent might just say, "I hear you’ve been pregnant and given birth before?"
How could they possibly have the face to continue fighting after that?
They might as well just surrender on the spot.
"Why so surprised? For every yin, there is a yang. For every positive, a negative. In this world, everything has a proper solution. Don’t you understand such a simple principle?" Mo Qi said, twisting the knife.
Hearing Mo Qi’s words, the already despondent Immortals felt their will to live draining away.
"If you had a solution, why didn’t you say so earlier?" one of the Immortals who had already cut himself open demanded furiously.
Mo Qi shrugged innocently. "You didn’t ask! Besides, did you even give me a chance to speak?"
"Before I could even open my mouth, you all got riled up by a certain someone, and then, without a second thought, you sliced yourselves open. Is that my fault?"
As soon as Mo Qi said this, the Immortals who had cut themselves open immediately shot hostile glares toward Huangfu Zhong.
If this bastard hadn’t jumped out and started spouting nonsense, why would they have been in such a rush?
Being stared at by so many Immortals, Huangfu Zhong panicked, but he feigned composure. "Are you really going to believe whatever this kid says? He claims he can remove them, so he can? Where’s the proof? Don’t forget who got your bellies big in the first place!"
Everyone: "???"
Although there was nothing technically wrong with that last sentence, it just sounded... strange.
Before the Immortals could change their minds, Mo Qi took out a small saucer. On it were a dozen or so roasted peanuts, all of them burnt.
"Here, eat one."
Mo Qi offered the saucer to the Immortal closest to him.
The Immortal stared, completely baffled.
’You want me to eat a peanut now?’
’And a burnt one at that.’
’Is this some kind of joke?’
"See? The kid’s just messing with us!" Huangfu Zhong secretly breathed a sigh of relief.
If Mo Qi really could solve the problem of the fetuses in their wombs, then he, Huangfu Zhong, would have effectively screwed over no fewer than a hundred powerful Immortals.
When the time came to settle that score, it would cost him his life!
"Mo Qi, you’re playing with fire!"
"You’ve gone too far! This is outrageous!"
"Mo Qi, I swear I will kill you!"
The powerful experts were furious. If not for their "pregnancies" and the fact that Silver Hair and Jin Hua were watching from the side, they would have annihilated Mo Qi right then and there.
Facing the enraged Immortals, Mo Qi just smiled nonchalantly.
"It’s fine if you want to look down on these peanuts for now. It’s also fine if you want to threaten me or kill me. After all, I’m not the one who’s pregnant. If you can stand it, feel free to keep dragging this out. Or, you could always choose the C-section."
After a pause, Mo Qi added, "Oh, right. I only have fewer than twenty of these peanuts at the moment. And they’re not free. You’ll have to pay for them!"
As soon as he said this, the flames of rage in the Immortals’ hearts burned even brighter, and they were on the verge of going berserk.
"You little brat, you’re dead!"
Nearly everyone had mentally marked Mo Qi for death.
Just then, the leading Immortal from the Long Yang Sub-Palace suddenly spoke up. "One Pseudo-Immortal Artifact. We’ll take all of your peanuts!"
The area immediately fell silent. Everyone else stared in utter shock, finding the Long Yang Sub-Palace’s decision unbelievable.
’A Pseudo-Immortal Artifact in exchange for a dozen or so burnt peanuts?!’
’Have they gone mad, or are our ears playing tricks on us?’
However, what followed was even more incredible: Mo Qi rejected the deal!
"There are nine of you from the Long Yang Sub-Palace, so I can only sell you nine peanuts. But the price isn’t some Pseudo-Immortal Artifact. It’s one Immortal Artifact per person, or Spirit Medicines and Treasures of equivalent value!"
