Chapter 88 - CONFRONTATION
I heard everything—from start to finish—all I could say is…. I'm a dead man. With her memory slowly returning, telling her the truth would be the best solution.
Before the door to Beatrix's room could open and someone would discover what I'm up to, I quickly retreated back to the privacy of my room dragging my sunken spirits behind me. I was about to talk to her, I told myself to ease my guilt, but when the topic of her memories came up, eavesdropping was my only option to acquire more valuable information.
Relieved to slip safely back to the privacy of my room, I sighed deeply and closed the door behind without the slightest sound. Lonely solitude welcomed me inside my dark dominion. Only the faint flicker of the lampshade helps illuminate the room, casting the unreachable corners with monstrous shadows.
I'm a dead man. The words echoed inside my head over and over again, torturing my already tortured soul. I slipped into the moon lit balcony grasping the cold rails until my knuckles turned white.
Beatrix hates me now. She has all the reasons to. Somehow the thought filled me with unbearable anguish. The thought she will leave—take Faith Vienne with her—tortures me to no end. There's a possibility she would do just that after she realized how I kept the truth from her.
'I was merely trying to protect her.' But I doubt if she will appreciate me for that. If I am in her shoes I will probably erupt like a volcano.
I want to punch the wall, more so, I want to punch myself for creating this mess. It's all my fault but who could blame me for wanting to be with her. She's all I've got now. I gave up everything because of her and feel not a slight tinge of regret but if she will be the one I will lose I will die of loneliness.
I never wanted anyone as much as I want her. Oh, god help me…. I love her too much.?I love Beatrix—Or Phoenix—whatever her name is. She's the only woman who made me realize the true meaning of love. She was selfless, a brave woman who gives her love without doubts… without reservation.
But whatever love she felt for me undoubtedly faded by the recent discovery after she realized I'm the ex-husband who mercilessly abandoned her and left her pregnant with a child. Whatever feelings she has for me—if there's any—it's now replaced with hate, loathing, disgust, and distrust. She will never look at me the same way again. I simply became good for nothing monster in front of her eyes.
If one day comes that I could not have her, I would rather die a quick death than spend the rest of my life without her in it.
I cannot undo what I have done. I cannot erase the mistakes I made. And the saddest thing about my regret, Beatrix will never forgive me and I will never forget.
'You're gonna die an old and lonely man, Ace, and it's all your fault. You deserve what you've got." The devil taunted inside my head. Hell yeah, he was right. I deserved it all.
I brushed my fingers into my hair. My gaze shifted to the pale moonlight surrounded by the pitch-black clouds. How lonely is the moon tonight, no bright stars to make the darkness cheerful and lively. I'm like the moon—hopeless, and shrouded with dark shadows.
The door to the left side of the balcony opened, light from within spilled outside as a figure clad in pristine white night dress emerged. The sheer garment made her perfect curves clearly visible by the moonlight. Her extremely long hair loosely fell to her shoulders, in an endless cascade of the luscious waterfall. My breath caught in my throat upon her phoenix eyes met mine.
Beatrix…. The softly spoken words barely escaped my trembling lips.
Her form froze beneath the closed door, her shoulders stiffened, her feet stopped moving as if paralyzed. An eternity passed before she finally recovered her composure and slowly moved in my direction with furious energy screaming in her aura.
I closed my eyes, bracing myself for the confrontation. I counted her footsteps and when I heard it no more, my eyes fluttered open. My breath caught in my throat when I became aware she's standing too close to me that his sweet natural scent mingled with soap invaded my nostrils.
"Please… let me explain everything, Beatrix."
Slap!
"That was for keeping the truth from me, Ace."
Slap!
"And that... was for treating me like a fool."
The slap came in all suddenness, leaving red imprints on both my cheeks before I could even recover. The bruised skin numbed from pain. I didn't even flinch, waiting for another painful blow that didn't arrive. Perhaps I deserved more than a slap. I deserved to be kicked in the crotch or pushed off from the balcony for keeping the truth she no doubt deserved to know.
"Since you goddam heard everything by eavesdropping on my room, tell me that everything's all a lie! Tell me!" Her tone rose several octaves. Her scathing eyes pierced through mine rendering me momentarily paralyzed to my place. She had spoken softly but coldly, but it was a weapon lethal enough to harshly slice my heart to pieces.
Beatrix undoubtedly discovered I was spying on her a while ago. It was obvious in the ways she spoke she's not letting the incident pass easily. She trembled with rage. If looks could kill I would have been a cold, lifeless corpse, moments ago.
I dreaded this confrontation. And the fact that I never saw her this angry before tripled my fear. Her reaction is not a good sign. She's like an active volcano showing the first signs of a dangerous rupture.
I moved closer, touched her arms reassuringly but she jerked my hands away as if disgusted by my touch. She made a single retrieving step then glared at me with fathomless rage. "Don't you dare touch me." She growled menacingly.
She continued to regard me with a look that could have frozen the depths of the underworld and could have melted the glaciers of Antarctica with their intensity.
She didn't simply hate me, it's an understatement.?Beatrice loathed my very existence. Seeing her look at me with so much disdain was an act of brutal punishment that no amount of physical pain could match.
"Hiring a private investigator would prove to be a total waste of time. I must end this once and for all, Beatrix. I am your ex-husband."
I wonder how I was able to say the words without breaking. The violent reaction I half expected she would burst into didn't come, instead, her face contorted into anguish, and a tear came tumbling down her cheeks.
"Why did you keep everything from me, Ace? Why?" She whimpered, her flushed cheeks were soaking with tears. Her legs gave up, and she slumped on the floor of the balcony as if all her strength had been drained by the confrontation.
"I am trying to protect you, Beatrix." The floor was hard and cold against my knee but it was the least of my concern. No matter how long I kneel in front of her it will not change anything. She abhorred me. No amount of words will make her forgive my foolishness. " I saw how happy you are. You've never been so cheerful before the way I've seen you now. I would be a fool to ruin the smile on your lips by telling you the truth."
"How could you be so cruel, Ace? Do you think I'd rather live with lies because I'm happy?" She shut her eyes tightly as if she's in so much pain. When she opened them again tears moved freely on her flushed cheeks. And when she continued speaking it was barely an audible whisper enough for me to hear. "Have you ever thought that countless times I lie awake at night wondering who I really am and what happened to me? You don't have any idea how many unanswerable questions kept me tortured over and over again."
Her rounded fist jabbed my shoulders repeatedly. I didn't shield myself from the blow. Instead, I allowed her to beat me until she could until she poured all her heart out. It's the only way to ease the weight off her chest.
Her soft tortured sobs were like acids burning through my heart.?When her strength faded, her arms loosely fell to her sides, I took her hands before they could entirely reach the ground and pulled her to my arms, hugged her so tight until no demons, and nightmares, and villains could snatch her away from me.
She didn't push me away. Or she wanted to but had no strength left in her to do so. She stayed in my arms for a long time until her sobs subsided. Her body was warm and soft and perfectly molded into my arms as if she belonged there. A sense of possessiveness hit me hard, I almost didn't want to let her go.
"Tell me the truth,?are you Faith Vienne's father?"
I took a deep, long breath before I replied. "There is without a doubt in my mind, Beatrix. I am Faith Vienne's father." I replied as sure as I needed air to breathe.
I stood up. Offer my palm and help her get up until she's steady on her feet. She moved closer to the rails and gripped it until her fingers paled from the exertion. She was leaning forward so I feared she might jump off from the balcony.
"Tell me, Ace…. What happened between us?"
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