Chapter 102 - OLD SCARS
From every wound
there is a scar,
and every scars
tells a story.
A story that says,
'I survived.'
***
"No one will hurt you, Ace. I'm here."
His stiff shoulders slowly eased. His eyes fluttered close, long exquisite eyelashes draped under his eyes. His labored breathing stopped as he began to relax.
"That's good. Just close your eyes and drift to sleep. You will feel better when you wake up."
I lay a soft kiss on his temples and heard him sigh. I caressed his hair and watched the rise and fall of his chest.
He'd been through a lot. I'm sure of that. He always shows his strong side. He never once allowed anyone to see his weakness, not even to me. But now he's like an open book. He even cried.
He must be in a lot of pain. His childhood had been extremely painful for him. He may not tell me what happened when he's a child but based on how he loathed his stepmother, I could guess she treated him unfairly. Perhaps his stepmother hurt him physically.
The scars on his back aside from the big one he acquired after saving me, were scattered on his back. There were so many of them. It's a result of severe whippings caused by a stick or a whip. But now he covered them with a phoenix tattoo. It's no longer visible but it was still there, my fingers felt the scar when I was changing his clothes a while ago.
The thought of Ace as a small boy abused and?battered was enough to fill me with dread. I want to scream from the injustice he suffered. He does not deserve that. No one deserves to suffer extreme pain especially if he is only a child.
His traumatic childhood must be the reason for his cold and emotionless personality. If he felt hope before perhaps he lost them already when his step mother shattered his dream with her lashing tongue and iron hands.
For a moment, I continued to watch him. If I could only take some of his pain I would share it so he doesn't need to carry all the weight on his own.
The world saw him as strong, brave, and intelligent. But no one saw the real him beyond the surface. What people saw was the image he wanted to show everyone but it wasn't the real him. The real Ace was a wounded man. Who's illusion of true love was ruined by a greedy woman.
"When I was fifteen years old, I badly wanted to play the violin…" Ace began just as I thought he was fast asleep. He captured my palms and brought them to his lips. His eyes remained closed as he continued. "Every day I saved a portion of my allowance so I could hire a private tutor. My dedication to save money paid off and I accumulated just enough money to hire someone who could help me improve my skills. For months, I secretly trained without my father and his wife knowing. They are against my passion because it's something they could never understand, and told me I couldn't gain money from it. They don't understand that it's not all about money, it's all about doing your passion and fulfilling something which makes you look forward to life."
He paused. His jaw gritted and his hands tightened around my palms. The memories revive the traumatic and dreadful experience he had. I know I should stop him since the pain gripping him was too much and yet I couldn't find enough courage to make him stop. He runs away from those memories almost all his life. It's time for him to face them and conquer his demons
"What happened, Ace?" I asked in a barely audible whisper. My eyes watered while
heavy emotions choked my throat. "Please tell me."
"The first time I held the violin around my small hands, it was the happiest moment of my life. It felt like I floated in the air and was transported to heaven. The tutor told me I'm a fast learner and exceptionally gifted in playing a musical instrument." His lips stretched into a blissful smile as he recalled the events. He was happy… so happy… that it broke my heart into a million pieces knowing it was short-lived and?a?traumatic event will soon follow. "But then… the day came when Samantha learned about my secret."
The smile on his lips faded. I bit my lips when his face contorted in agony. My hands tightened around his fingers to make him feel I'm there with him. But he never seemed to know I was there. In an icy tone that could have frozen the depths of the underworld he continued. "Samantha was outraged. I will never forget how her face contorted with fury when she asked me how long I'd been playing the violin. She slapped me in the face multiple times until my face was numbed and I told her the truth. When I said I'd been training for nearly three years, she hit my hands three hundred sixty times ."
"Did she hit you with the violin bow as a punishment?" I know my voice would be trembling as I spoke but hearing my voice crack this much shocked me.
Dear God. This is painful. I mumbled inwardly while asking him for some strength and a bit of courage to listen to what happened next.
Ace shook his head. "She made me kneel to the floor with my arms held to the air and hit me hard with the violin until my fingers bled badly and until my bones were broken. I haven't been able to use my hands for a year after the incident. It took me years of therapy to be able to move them again. When I recovered I never touched a musical instrument again. I'm flooded with unbearable memories when I touch them. I totally gave up the only thing that kept me alive all these years."
"Ace….Ace…" I sobbed. The emotions I tried to keep under control broke into a rampage. I found myself wrapped into his arms when it was he who was supposed to be needing my comfort.
"Hush… Please don't cry at my expense. I'm not as fragile as I look. I'm made of sturdy stuff." His hands caressed my hair while he consoled me but it only made me cry harder.
"It must be hard losing the only thing that makes you feel alive."
"Hard would be an understatement Phoenix. When I couldn't play the violin anymore a part of me died. I lost my happiness and purpose in life. The only thing that was keeping me alive was breathing. I'm almost dead from the inside as well as from the outside."
"Oh, Ace… I'm so sorry…" Ace pulled me into his arms and pressed his temples into my own.
Abundant tears flow from his eyes as he stares at me. "Don't be sorry Phoenix. You just don't know how you revived my broken soul the day you came into my life. I have never known real happiness until the day I met you."
He pressed his lips to my cheeks kissing the beads of tears slithering my flushed cheeks. It was outrageous to think we're both crying over the past.
"The moment I met you, I didn't just find the missing piece of my life but I found painting as well. You inspired me to draw and to color what I paint with vibrant colors. You taught me that even after my great downfall someone would come to rescue me. I'm the prince who was supposed to save you. Instead, you became the dashing princess who freed me from my dark prison cell."
He hugged me into his arms as if he was telling me that I am not alone. We have each other now. Whatever lies in the past it's already behind us and we must now look forward to the future that we still have.
"From now on I will pursue to bring you nothing but happiness. I will replace all the bad memories with good ones so you could bring them with you wherever you go. I will serve you until my last breath. I will treat you as my Queen and Faith Vienne my princess—our princess. I only want us to rebuild a castle of good memories so that when I'm gone you will remember me as your King and not the cruel villain I once had been. I love you Phoenix. I always have and always will. And if one day my love for you will be put to test, I shall shield my body and catch a bullet for you. Nothing would make me more proud of myself than dying to protect you."
And after he finished his vow, he tilted my chin and claimed my lips. The warmth of his soft lips was so addictive that I found myself responding with the same passionate enthusiasm. I shut my eyes tightly and savored the softness of his lips pressed to mine.
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