Chapter 1169: Believer & Non-Believer
"You don't want the good person card. You don't accept that you're a gentleman. What do you mean by that?" asked Raelle. "I honestly think you're good. Why don't you?"
"You don't know me that doesn't mean I don't know myself. I have this self-awareness. I'm not a good person and neither do I want to be. Do you know what happens to good people? They are easily morally kidnapped by bad people. So, I'd rather not take the title of a good person."
Seeing how Raelle looked at him, Ru's lips curled into a smirk.
"What? You must be thinking that I have a bizarre way of talking, right?"
Raelle honestly nodded, "I don't know but you give a very different vibe from the people your age."
"Growing up, I didn't interact much with people my age," told Ru. "Not even with my cousins. This young master was always dragged from one grandmaster to another to learn something new. You can say that I have more bonding with people who are two generations above me than my peers. That's why, all my life, I could hardly even relate to people my age. I guess I got old before time."
"Was it difficult growing up in such an environment?" asked Raelle.
"No," answered Ru. "It wasn't difficult."
"Wasn't?" repeated Raelle. "I feel like you're very restricted."
"No way. Who can restrict me? If I was restricted would I grow up like I did? It's just that when you are at a high place, you have a lot more responsibilities. And that's why I was taught so much. I was told from a young age that neither my elder brother nor my younger brother will inherit the position of my father but me. I was chosen Patriarch of the next generation. So, I had to do more to be worthy of that position too."
Raelle didn't say anything about it when she heard that but just focused on what Ru was doing. She watched him roll his sleeves up to his forearm, tying an apron around his waist, then taking the kitchen knife and vegetables. Her eyes followed all the movements as Ru cut shredded the carrots, cabbage, zucchini, and then onion. All of this took barely a few minutes.
When Ru was preparing the batter, Raelle finally asked, "What are you making?"
"Yachejeon(Vegetable pancake)," answered Ru without even looking up. "Wanna try some?" Before Raelle could refuse, Ru went on, "Don't say no just because you had breakfast. Who stipulated that you can't eat after breakfast?"
Raelle thought about it for a moment before saying, "But still, there is time for everything."
Ru shook his head, "No. You think too much. If your body is hungry, that's the time to eat. If your body is craving something, there is no need to be so harsh on yourself. Just have a few bites. If nothing else, you can give yourself a break. I could never do this. I don't compromise on my happiness. And the food is happiness."
"That's what Hyson says too," said Raelle.
"It's because he knows that life doesn't need big things to be happy. Small things matter a lot more. You suddenly crave the spicy boiled mutton and the next moment, someone brings it to you, won't you feel happy? It's nothing big but the happiness it brings in inexplicable."
Raelle couldn't help asking, "What do you value most in life?"
"I value self-respect," said Ru. "I don't like wronging myself. I was taught everything but I wasn't taught how to compromise on my happiness and self-respect. I can compromise on a lot of things but not on these two."
Raelle nodded as she watched the pancake being cooked in a sizzling pan. After a while, she smelled the aroma and suddenly had an urge to really take a bite.
After the pancake became golden, Ru took it out on the cutting board and cut it into bite-sized pieces before putting it into a serving plate. After that, he washed the used utensils and mixed soy sauce with sesame.
Putting a clean chopstick in front of Raelle, he said, "Bringing a change doesn't mean you have to take a drastic step. It could start from here. Just try a bite. It's okay. I promise it won't hurt."
Raelle actually picked up the chopsticks to try a bite.
"It seemed pretty easy," commented Raelle. "Why don't you all just let me try it."
"You use your brain on better things. Leave this aside. You won't go hungry with your husband around," said Ru and took a seat on the high stool before eating the pancake he made just now. "I almost forgot that I have a gift for you."
"Gift?" asked Raelle. "You already did so much for me. Is there a need to add another gift?"
"That is one thing, this is another thing. We can't compromise on either," said Ru. "Let me finish eating, I'll give it to you."
"I'm not in a hurry," said Raelle.
"You are really not in a hurry?" asked Ru. "May I ask, why?"
"Why? I should be in a hurry?"
"Shouldn't you go to see your husband? You already learned what you wanted to learn. Why are you still following me?"
"Something is telling me that I won't be seeing you so soon after today," replied Raelle.
"Not bad," said Ru. "I am leaving today. That's true. So, yeah. It'll be difficult to meet again."
"You won't come to my wedding?"
"Are you inviting?"
"Of course!"
"Then I'll try. But it's hard to say if I'll be able to come. I don't usually stay in one place for a long time."
After eating, Ru went to wash his hands again and pulled out a wooden box, and gave it to her. Raelle took it but didn't open it.
"Open it," said Ru.
"It's not nice to open a gift in front of the person who gives it to you," replied Raelle.
"You don't have to be so particular about it," was Ru's response. "If you don't open it, how would I know if you like the gift or not?"
"Gift is a gift."
"Open!" was the only thing Ru said, giving Raelle no chance to refute again.
Raelle opened the box and looked at the thing inside with a thoughtful look before she pulled it out and asked, "What's this?"
"Blood beeswax prayer beads," explained Ru. "There are a total of 108 beads on this string. Do you know what it represents?"
Raelle shook her head.
"I knew it," commented Ru. "The 108 beads represent 108 industries, and 108 Buddhist deities. 108 paths of the Buddha, 108 types of meditations, and the destruction of 108 worries." He took a pause and added, "In ancient Indian astronomy, the distance between the Earth and the Sun is approximately 108 times the Sun's diameter. Similarly, the average distance between the Earth and the Moon is approximately 108 times the Moon's diameter. Moreover, the number 108 is considered sacred and auspicious. It is believed to represent the wholeness and completeness of the universe, with the digit 1 symbolizing the divine or unity, the digit 0 representing emptiness or potential, and the digit 8 signifying infinity or eternity."
Raelle still had a thoughtful expression as she said, "You do know that I'm not really a believer. You don't look like one too. So, what's with this gift?"
"I could give anything else too but this is a form of a blessing. It's consecrated by an eminent monk. The one you met at the temple last time. I might not be a believer but I'm not a nonbeliever too. In fact, I'd rather believe in the unbelievable than anything else. You believe in what you see but some things are not seen. Just because you can't see them doesn't mean they don't exist."
"I don't repeat myself but I'm gonna say it again, you have a bizarre way of speech."
"I'm an eccentric person too," said Ru generously. "Some say I have a profound way of speech. Some say I have a bizarre way of speech. Some also think I'm just talking nonsense. I'm fine with anything. Because I know what I'm saying and what I think. I don't say things I don't mean."
"Maybe that's why I liked you instantly. You don't hesitate to say anything like I don't. It's just that my words end up hurting people more often than not. But I don't think you face that problem."
Ru smiled at her, "What makes you think that? I am not that likable either. It's just that I am more charming so people don't dare talk nonsense in front of me and don't mind my nonsense either."
"You're very narcissistic as Hyson said," said Raelle.
"That's also a talent. Not everyone has it," answered Ru. "Actually, my grandfather asked me to give you this gift. These beads were kept with our family by your grandmother."
"Huh?"
"Really. I don't lie. This thing originally belongs to your family. It's just I think your grandmother must have wanted you to have it."
The source of this c𝐨ntent is freewe(b)nov𝒆l