1108 [Bonus chapter] Not Good Enough
"You should stop living in the past," said Grandfather Xiang. "That's what my Raelle told me. She made me realize a lot of things in life and one of the reasons why I don't hate you is her. After all, you gave birth to her. How will I get such an amazing granddaughter? So, shouldn't I be thanking you instead?"
Song Xin'ai was a little taken aback when she heard him say that.
"At the end of the day, you're the mother of my grandchildren. Not only Raelle, but you also gave us Weimin and Wai too. How can I blame you? Whatever happened back then was unexpected and took us all by surprise. We all made decisions in the fit of emotions. Some of us made the right decision, others not so very much. I won't comment on whether you made the right decision or not, after all, only you'd know that. But I'm actually happy where I am in my life now," Grandfather Xiang had a relaxed look on his face. "Yes, my wife left way too soon but it's okay. I'm very proud of her. Every single person in my family is born a soldier. And we were always ready to give this life for this country too. I never expected that the one who would end up giving her life for the country would be my own wife who wasn't a soldier and who was really afraid of pain. She was a squeamish little lady from a capitalist family and yet, she was brave enough to give her life. So, I can't be prouder of her."
"I never thought you'd say that," said Song Xin'ai. "I have always respected you a lot and today I can say that I didn't respect the wrong person. You deserve what you have Elder Xiang. You really deserve it all."
"You deserve better too, Xin'ai," he said as he called her name with familiarity. "Don't be so hard on yourself. You should stop living in guilt. After meeting Raelle, I'm sure you learned that she doesn't blame you either. She is a lot more sober than all of us combined. So, she'd never force you to take responsibility for anything. She is a little slow when it comes to emotions but her mind is very clear about what she wants."
"That's why I'm here, Elder Xiang," replied Song Xin'ai. "I hesitated a lot before coming today. I was wondering if I should really come or not but in the end, I decided to come just because Raelle made the effort to deliver that invitation card to me personally. It meant a lot to me. So, I decided to come. I definitely want to face everything that I had been running from."
"That's good to know," said Grandfather Xiang. "Don't think so much with your overactive mind. Those three are still your kids and you can meet them whenever you want."
*Ring!*
Song Xin'ai apologized to him and took out her phone from her purse. When she looked at the caller id, her expression was distorted. Grandfather Xiang didn't even have to see to know why she had "Answer what I asked," came the response. "Who are you to question your mother instead? You 09:23
unfilial daughter! See how I straighten you once you come home. Now, stop trying to distract me this change. How sad that some things really don't change!
"Be comfortable and talk to more people today," said Grandfather Xiang. "Don't stay in the corner. It's rare for you to come out of the lab. So interact with humans. They can be very interesting too."
Song Xin'ai forgot about the phone in her hand and looked up at him with a smile, "I will."
"Good," said Grandfather Xiang before he leisurely operated his wheelchair to step aside to give her enough space to take the phone call.
Song Xin'ai could see his intentions clearly and gave a wry smile before she picked up the phone call. An aged but energetic voice came from the other side, "Xin'ai, where are you?"
"Why are you asking, mother?"
"Answer what I asked," came the response. "Who are you to question your mother instead? You unfilial daughter! See how I straighten you once you come home. Now, stop trying to distract me and tell me where you are. I heard you took a leave from the lab."
"You're keeping tabs on what I do and where I am?" asked Song Xin'ai. "Can't I take a leave for a day? I could be sick too."
"What do you mean you could be sick? Didn't you just recover? Why are you getting sick every other day. How can you be so useless? Do you know that your daughter's engagement is today? Why didn't you tell me about it?"
"I didn't raise that daughter. How would I know her affairs? Besides, even if I did know, why would I tell you about it?"
"How can you not tell me? I'm your old mother! Are you going against me now? Be careful or I'll go and complain to your leaders about what an unfilial scorge you are!"
"It's not like you haven't done it before," replied Song Xin'ai. "Can you get to the point? Why are you calling? I'm sure it's not just to yell at me for being unfilial. We have already established it long ago that I'm just not good enough in the Song family. Haven't we?"
She was so used to her mother's behavior or way of talking that she didn't react at all. She might used to feel embarrassed once upon a time but that was long gone. She had gone through enough embarrassment to become thick skinned.
When she received the invitation from Raelle unexpectedly, not even for a second it came to her mind that she should let her maternal family knew. Why would she tell those blood suckers? Didn't she know what they were capable of or what their weight was?
How can she add this trouble to Raelle's life? Wasn't it enough that her Weimin and Wai had to suffer along with her from this maternal family of hers? It was better to keep Raelle away from all this. She was better off without such relatives.
Have you ever felt like you're living in a daze? That's how I've been feeling these days. Don't know where life is taking me or where it'll take me eventually. I don't even know how to feel about this.
XiaoMeeHee
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