Chapter 596: In the Shadow of Fear - Part 7
RETH
When he reached the cave Gahrye was just leaving. At the look on Reth's face, he raised his hands. "She's fine. She's just sleeping. And Jayah's watching her while I go get some food and come back—I never got dinner."
"It's fine," Reth growled. "I'm here now." And realizing he hadn't eaten either. He was about to continue into the cave, then forced himself to pause. "Thank you for coming when I couldn't," he said gruffly. "It's been a long day. I didn't like leaving her alone."
Gahrye nodded. "I know the feeling," he said starkly. Then turned on his heel and started for the forest.
Reth almost called him back, but he wasn't yet sure and he didn't want to get the male's hopes up again, then have to dash them. So instead he called after him, "I'll be at the cave all day tomorrow. You can take the day off if you want to."
Gahrye hesitated, then turned. "That would be good. I have some things I need to do with the disformed."
Reth nodded. "Thank you again for helping. Enjoy your day."
Gahrye didn't smile, but he nodded before turning away and picking up his pace again.
Reth rushed into the cave, barely greeting Jayah who had stepped into the kitchen to make tea, before hurrying through to the bedchamber and closing the door behind him.
The only light came from the tiniest gap around the door, but his eyes adjusted quickly and he found his mate curled up under the furs, her hand under her pillow, legs pulled up to support her belly that seemed like it had grown even since that morning.
Stripping off quickly, but letting his clothes drop and kicking them to the wall so he wouldn't wake her with the closet doors, Reth slowly climbed into the furs behind her.
His skin was cold from the chill night air outside and he forced himself not to touch her right away, to lay under the furs and warm before he slid across to spoon her, one hand finding her waist—and that hard stomach—and cupping it protectively.
"Reth?" she sighed and started to turn, but he shushed her and curled himself around her.
"I'm here. I'm sorry I was gone so long. I won't leave again like that, Elia."
She sighed heavily. "I'm so glad you're here." Her voice was thick, heavy with sleep, but she twined her fingers through his and pinned his arm under her elbow, as if she was afraid he would let go.
She didn't need to worry, he wasn't going anywhere.
"I'm so glad you're safe and I'm back here too," he murmured, nuzzling the back of her neck. "Just rest now, Elia. I'll still be here when you wake."
She started to murmur something about wanting to hear what the elders had decided, but trailed off in the middle of the sentence.
Reth kissed her shoulder and left his lips on her skin, holding her without moving until her breathing settled and slowed again.
Then, ignoring his growling stomach, he breathed and prayed and slackened his muscles until he followed her into sleep.
*****
The next morning, when hunger pushed him to wake, the lanterns were already on. He'd slept in.
He sucked in a breath and began to stretch, but realized he was still holding Elia.
"Good morning," she said softly, her voice rough with sleep.
"Did I wake you, Love?"
"No, I've been trying not to wake you," she said, then awkwardly turned in his arms, rolling over with a groan about her back until she faced him.
Some of her hair fell over her eyes, and some of his had come loose from its tie after all the clawing and raking he'd done the night before. So they stared at each other through the tines of blond and near-black hair.
"Hi," he said.
"Hi," she whispered, and she smiled. And Reth would have sworn her smile was the sun rising in his heart. "Do you have to go to meetings again today?"
Reth grunted and stroked her hair back from her face. "I told them they have to come here to me. And today's discussions will be more… logistical. I'll be able to take breaks and come see you," he said.
Her forehead lined when he said he had meetings, but she swallowed and only said, "That's good. I'm glad you'll be close."
"Me too. I missed you so badly yesterday, Elia. I'm so sorry. It was necessary, but I ached every moment of it. I just wanted to hold you."
She nodded and her eyes began to shine as if she fought tears. "I just wanted to be held."
They stared at each other another minute.
"Reth, what's wrong with us?" she asked quietly.
Reth sighed. "We almost lost each other, Love. It's… it's a wound that's still healing."
She nodded. "I thought when I was back here I wouldn't feel afraid anymore," she said. "But… it's like the closer I am to you, the more afraid I feel—not of you," she rushed on when his eye widened. "But… it's like because you're close, being apart is even harder. I didn't expect that."
"Me either," he said, gathering her into his chest. Both of them curled around her large belly.
Reth had a flash of memory—a vision, or a dream. He'd seen them, just like this, together and curled around her stomach. Months earlier. But it was foggy. All he knew was that this was what he'd been waiting for. And it was so utterly frustrating that they couldn't simply rest together and prepare for this baby.
He stroked her back and hair and kissed her softly and wished that they could spend the day just like this. But he knew it wouldn't last long. Jayah would be in here soon to check Elia, and his security council would arrive after breakfast.
He prayed one of them thought to bring him food. Because no matter how hungry he was, he wasn't leaving Elia a second sooner than he needed to.
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