Chapter 415: The Fight
GAHRYE
They were still sitting on the couch, Gahrye almost afraid to breathe—he was so closely monitoring her breathing and scent. If she was going to shift, he wanted Kalle out of the way. Just in case. But Elia remained in her true body, though her hands shook as she turned pages on the first of the journals he'd given her.
He'd picked on book out of the bag at random and was thumbing through the lineage of the Kings seven hundred years earlier when the door finally opened again and his mate entered. He'd heard her steps climbing the massive staircase, but it was still always a relief when she was in front of his eyes.
Yet, as he got to his feet to greet her, she gave him a warning look, turned and locked the door behind her, then turned back to them both, leaning on the door behind her.
"What's wrong?" Gahrye asked immediately.
Elia looked up, her face falling into worry when she saw the look on Kalle's face.
"You guys are going to have to talk to Shaw. He's getting desperate and I'm not sure what he'll do if he breaks."
"What?!" Elia growled.
Gahrye put a hand to her shoulder. "Stay calm," he muttered.
Elia took a deep breath.
Kalle walked toward him a warning in her eyes that he didn't understand. "He's… he's basically told me he's not going to give you another house until you tell him what the voices told you or tempted you with in the traverse. He's the record holder—and it's legit. I mean, I can't deny that. He has these interviews with every single Anima who comes through. So he's not making this up to try and pry. But he's… he's definitely disturbed that you guys aren't talking. Disturbed in a way I haven't seen him before."
She walked straight to Gahrye and wrapped her arms around his waist. "You have to do it. Just get it over with. Decide what you're going to tell him, and what you aren't—tell him you don't remember, or whatever—but you need to get him off your back. The fact that you guys aren't talking is making him think there's something you don't want to tell him—and that's just going to make him even more determined to get it out of you."
"But there is," Elia muttered without looking up from the book in her lap.
Gahrye looked a question at her, but she wasn't watching them. Then he remembered how he'd felt watching her and Reth all the time and he felt bad. He stroked Kalle's cheek, then took her arms from behind his back and gave them back to her with a tip of his head towards Elia.
"What is it that you don't want to tell him?" Gahrye asked Elia, walking around the table to join her back on the couch.
"All of it. I don't want to talk to anyone about it," Elia said. She sounded like a child, pouting. Was this another surge of pregnancy emotions? Gahrye frowned.
"I don't either," he said softly. "But Kalle wouldn't tell us to do it if it wasn't wise."
Elia looked up at Kalle then, her eyes shining with unshed tears. "I don't care. I know you mean well, Kalle, but you don't understand. You haven't been through there. And you can't… you can't understand it until you do. I'm not dredging all that up. I'm not talking about it!"
Kalle's forehead lined with worry. "Shaw is only going to record the facts, he isn't going to use it against you."
"I don't care. This isn't about Shaw. I don't want to talk to anyone about it. I can't!"
Something prickled in Gahrye's instincts when she said that, but before he could ask, Kalle came around to sit on the coffeetable in front of Elia. "Is there… is there a half-truth you could tell him? Something similar to what happened, but not the actual story? He knows more about the voices than anyone, and if you don't tell him, he'll be prying and pestering—he won't give you your space."
"Well, he can kiss my—"
"That's a good idea, Kalle," Gahrye rushed in quickly, uncertain if Elia remembered that Kalle was Shaw's niece. "Elia, wouldn't that be easier? Coming up with something close to the truth, but not the truth? Then he'll get off our backs, and we can get a more private place for you to rest."
"Why should we? What's he even going to do with it?"
Gahrye hadn't seen Elia so defensive since her early months in Anima. She looked like she wanted to bite something—and that she was afraid something would bite her.
"Elia… can you tell us—tell me—what it is you're wanting to avoid? Is there something you need help with?"
"No!" she snapped and pushed to her feet, away from Gahrye. "This isn't anything to do with any of you and I'm not… I'm not interested in talking about it with anyone!" she leaned down and picked up the two books Gahrye had given her. "I'm tired. I'm going to go to my room and read." She pushed past Kalle's knees and around the couch to return to her room behind them.
Gahrye sighed. "Elia—"
"No, Gahrye. I'm not doing it. I'm Queen. If that's what it takes, tell him I'm pulling rank. I'm not talking about this. Not with him. Not with you. Not with anyone. The voices aren't real and they can't do any of the stuff they say they can. So there's no point."
"Okay, okay, we won't force you to talk, Elia," Gahrye said, following her quickly. "But I want Kalle to hear what's going on with you and the beast. The shifting. You're struggling. Let us help you!"
Elia stopped with her hand on the knob of the door to her room. For a moment, when she dropped her head, he thought she was going to start crying. But then she sucked in a deep breath and turned to face him, her shoulders back and chin down.
"I'm fighting all the time. Every day. And I'm… I feel like I'm starting to lose that fight. So I'm going to go lay down and be calm, like you said," she said through her teeth. Then she looked at Kalle. "You take care of him. If he wants to talk to Shaw, that's fine. But you don't let Shaw hurt him or you deal with me. And remember, I have teeth now. And claws."
Kalle blinked, but Gahrye sensed she was fighting a smile when she nodded. "I'm sorry you're struggling, Elia."
Elia's breath caught. "Thank you for helping us. I'm sorry I'm so strung out today. You guys should just rest and read and… whatever. I'm going to be by myself for a few hours."
"Elia—"
But she just shot him a look, then disappeared into her room. He heard the click of the lock and sighed.
He didn't move for a minute, asking himself what he should do. She was clearly tense and hurting. Was it better to leave her alone as she'd asked? Or to make Kalle go so he could talk to her alone?
The two females liked each other—he could smell it on both of them. But that didn't mean they knew each other, or trusted each other. Not yet.
He raked a hand through his hair, then suddenly Kalle was there, holding him, pressing her head into his chest and he couldn't do anything but slide his arms around her and pull her in.
"She's going to be okay," his mate whispered. "We're going to help her, and she's going to be okay. And so are you."
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