Chapter 358: Awakening
LERRIN
He walked slowly back to camp so he wouldn't catch her unless she wanted to be caught. The truth was, he wasn't sure he wanted to. His mind was spinning. He was trembling. The feeling was gone now that she wasn't there, but it had been so real. So tangible.
He'd never experienced the True Mate's bond, but… but he'd heard. And that…
But she'd fled. She'd seen in the look in his eyes, likely smelled his desire, and she'd fled.
It hit him then, what these males were doing, what any Anima did when they violated another—took what didn't belong to them. They stole more than they could see.
Those males had made Suhle afraid of something that should be beautiful. Something precious. Something pleasurable.
They'd stolen her ability to receive… love.
Lerrin snorted, swallowed, raked a hand through his hair. Even to himself he sounded like an adolescent female. But the conviction wouldn't leave him.
When those males took her young body against her will, they stole a piece of her that was now broken and… and it might mean she could never enjoy the body of a male who would not steal, but offer himself for her. Where most Anima received the scent of desire and were flattered, or would consider if the other were of interest, Suhle had been taught to fear.
The thought made him want to weep for her.
Then it made him want to weep for himself. Because if he was right, they'd stolen her from him as well.
He blew out a breath, still unable to believe what he was thinking. What he was feeling.
It was too surreal. He couldn't be right.
Could he?
Then it struck him that it didn't actually matter even if he was. She would never take him. She would never take any male. She'd been wounded beyond healing. And she didn't need him slavering over her every time she turned around.
If he was right or wrong, the result would be the same. Unless he caused her to fear—and then she would be wounded again.
He shook his head and swallowed the pinch in his throat. He would go back to the tent and work on those maps he'd been putting off. And when she came back, he'd be… untouched. Unaware. He would not put himself in her space. He would show her she was safe and had nothing to fear. He would swallow down whatever that feeling was and he would show her she could live in peace.
And he would give her his cover for… well, forever.
He nodded to himself, and picked up his pace. He wanted to make sure he was at the tent when she returned.
*****
He was delayed in the camp for almost half an hour, breaking up a fight between a fist of drunk guards. After dominating them and calling in their fist leader—a graying male who shook his head and apologized to Lerrin for having to deal with the pups—his resolve to address the issues in his people was galvanized.
He could not keep putting it off. He had to get proactive. If Suhle couldn't find out when the next meeting was between the leaders, he would have to begin addressing the surface tensions publicly and pray they thought him only concerned about issues of discipline.
When he reached the tent, he was deep in thought, but as the Guards saluted and he walked between them, he hesitated. "I have some very important strategies to work on. Do not allow anyone to interrupt me. If my servant returns, tell her to make tea and remain quiet while I focus. Unless the Security Council is called, I do not want to be disturbed between now and dinner."
"Your servant is within, Sire," the male said. Did Lerrin imagine the emphasis he gave to the word "servant"? "And she isn't alone. Would you like us to chase the male out?" the guard said, fighting a smirk.
Lerrin frowned. "Who is with her?"
"One of your council males. Daryn? He said he had a report for you and needed to—"
But Lerrin was already gone, shoving back the tent flap and striding into his tent to find Suhle standing with her back to the bench where she prepared the tea, while the male stood over her, too close.
Far too close.
Lerrin growled.
Both of them snapped their heads around to look at him. Lerrin didn't miss Suhle reaching behind her for the knife that she used to strip herbs from their stalks while Daryn was distracted. Lerrin caught her eye once—saw the cold terror there mingled with rock-solid determination—and he snarled, "What are you doing here, Daryn?"
To Suhle he sent, Did he touch you?
No, she replied and if she'd spoken it would have been breathless. Lerrin wanted to bite something.
Unaware of their connection, Daryn eased back from Suhle slightly. Though he kept his stance casual, he still remained far too close to her in Lerrin's opinion. "I was waiting for you, and I hoped your servant might make me some tea while I waited," he said, with a hot glance at Suhle.
Her upper lip twitched to bare her teeth. But Lerrin was already striding over, putting himself between them, shoving the male back with a snarl.
Daryn's eyebrows popped up as he stumbled back, taken off guard. "Sire, what—"
"We are wolves. We have honor. We do not take what is not offered!" he growled, pushing Daryn back again so the male stumbled and had to catch his step.
He straightened looking confused, and a little nervous. "Of course not, it… it was just tea—"
"Do I strike you as a fool, Daryn? Do you think I miss your eyes on her? The way you stand over her? Do you think I will turn a blind eye to you pressuring a female when she has not made the signals? I will not. I do not."
The younger male's eyes turned stormy and he braced. "I was just asking for fucking tea."
"Well, if you will not take her signals, receive mine: The answer is no. You are not welcome here and you will never be. Get out of my tent. If I see you looming over an unreceptive female again I will personally tear out your throat."
"It was tea!"
"Do not lie to me!" Lerrin snarled, his voice guttural, the words trailing into a growl as he invaded the male's space and let himself feel his Alpha power. "I am neither blind, nor a fool. I do not know what has infected our people, but you follow me and I say no. Do you understand?"
The male held his gaze for a silent second and internally Lerrin pleaded with him to take a strike so he had reason to shift and bite out the male's throat.
But Daryn was on the security council for a reason. He was not stupid or blind, either. A moment later he blinked and submitted, though reluctantly.
Lerrin continued to stand over him in warning. "You will leave here, and you will never enter my tent again save for a council meeting or personal invitation from me. Do you understand?"
"Yes, Sire," he ground out.
"And if I see, or hear of any situation in which a female near you feels threatened I. Will. Kill. You."
Daryn quivered and turned away, stepping for the tent flap and freedom, well aware that he had been bested, though angry about it. "Yes, Sire," he growled. Then he was gone.
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