Chapter 277: The Shift - Act 2
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*****
ELIA – Human World
Elia stood in the middle of the room, staring at rich, patterned carpet, her head spinning.
Gahrye was out in the hallway, speaking with the Guardian Kalle, trying desperately to find something they could use. Learn from. Figure out how to anticipate this… what was this? What was she?!
Gahrye thought she'd almost shifted.
But that was impossible. It couldn't be. It physically couldn't be. She was human, not Anima!
Then she looked at her belly and realized not only who, but what was growing there. What she and Reth had made.
A wave of joy cascaded over her that crested in a jagged hammer blow of grief and fear.
Reth should be here. He should know this. He would be excited, she was sure—and protective. He would fuss, and kiss her, and…
Tears blurred her vision. How was she going to do this without him?
How was she going to do this at all? She was human!
She clawed her hands through her hair as torrent of anger swelled in her chest at the injustice of it all. She felt like she was about to combust from the inside out. How did they do this? How did the Anima walk around every day not bursting into their beasts and eating each other?
She felt the urge to bite something. Literally.
Her body shuddered.
No. No, no no no no no.
She couldn't do this. She'd watched Reth go through this already—struggle to control the beast within. But there was no Aymora here, no syrup that would keep her magically in her body.
Why the hell had he sent her here? Why hadn't he come with her?!
WHAT THE HELL WAS SHE GOING TO DO?
Her body was rocked by something, a surge of strength—of rage that fueled strength. She felt… mighty. Her skin rippled and she dropped her head back, trying to breathe and hold onto herself.
She was losing herself.
No, she couldn't give in. She didn't know how to do this. What was going to happen to her if… no.
Breathe, Elia. Breathe.
The Anima were taught as cubs—Reth had told her they all went through this. Especially as toddlers, and again in adolescence, they struggled against this urge. But they didn't have to do it alone. Their parents and tribes helped them. Coached them through it—and occasionally medicated them when the struggle was especially difficult.
But she was alone.
Fear prickled down her spine and she shivered, her fingers clawing, twitching.
Her eyes widened. She could feel it… this thing. This power. This beast trying to tear its way out of her—
A strange noise erupted from her throat. The room was suddenly brighter and she could hear Gahrye and Kalle whispering in the hallway. She shook her head. No, she couldn't. She was human. She couldn't hear whispers through two walls and three massive rooms.
She shuddered again and felt something at the back of her neck…
Holy shit. Holy shit. She had to calm down. She had to think about… something good. Stop this from happening.
She closed her eyes and breathed deeply, focusing on her happiest memories… Reth, the night she'd given her throat—the way he'd looked so humbled and overwhelmed. The way he'd stared at her like she was something precious.
…And the night she realized she had to leave. When he'd knelt before her, promising himself to her and Elreth—
A groan burst from her throat… a groan that became a resonant call. A sound she'd never made, never heard, rolling in her throat and chest.
Shit. Shit shit shit.
She couldn't let this happen—but she could feel her body rolling towards something, something calling to her, pulling her out of herself. "Gahrye?" she whispered, and her voice rolled off into a growl. "Gahrye!" she said louder, shuddering and shivering, not moving because it felt like if she took a step, when she put her foot down it would be as… something else.
Hasty footsteps sounded in the hallway. But it was going to be too late. She didn't know what to do. Reth. She needed Reth! "GAHRYE!"
The door flew open. She startled, turning towards the threat and it was as if the world… twisted.
For a moment she saw Gahrye's face, eyes wide searching for her, then finding her and widening. "Elia," he whispered. "Just breathe. I don't know how to help—"
Then she exploded.
*****
It was as if there were two of her—her mind, her sanity, tucked in behind a snarling, frightened beast. And she could feel both.
But her self, her was a passenger on this ride.
Through the eyes of whatever she had become she found herself staring at a wide-eyed, half-crouched Gahrye.
Slowly, slowly he closed the door behind her—and she was glad, because she felt the beast's urge to run for the gap, to run until she found a dark forest, a shadowed cave, something to hide in.
Then she felt it lock on Gahrye, who stood, half-crouched, his hands up before him, staring at her. At it. Whatever.
She had no voice. No way to tell him that this… this thing smelled him as prey. Half-horse, half-man, both weak.
The beast began to prowl slowly sideways its eyes locked on him. He kept himself facing it and his voice reached her.
"I haven't been through this, Elia, I can't describe it to you… but I've heard… you have to dominate. You have to control. You may have to fight for it. But take what is yours. And be calm. Just… own it."
She wanted to nod but it was as if she was out of her body, connected somehow to this animal, but her own self waiting…
But dominating? How did that even work? She felt like she was tied to this thing, unable to move, unable to have any hand in her own—
Then it took a step toward Gahrye and she could taste him—taste the desire for him. She wanted to scream, but as the animal leapt for her dearest friend, everything within her roared.
"NO!"
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