Chapter 224: Giving Over
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ELIA
She woke in what had to be the dark of night. Aymora must have left a small light on somewhere. Light seemed to draw from a small source behind her, just barely enough to see the shapes and shadows of the room—and the great shoulders of her mate, curled up on a cot next to her.
Her heart leapt when she saw him, smelled him. He had one arm extended, resting on her cot as if he reached for her, even in sleep.
Rolling over slowly so she wouldn't wake him, she examined his face in the dim light.
He was shirtless, and the blanket had fallen off his shoulders, to his waist. But the cold didn't seem to touch him.
His brow was lined. There were bruises and scratches all over him. And his jaw was tight. She yearned to reach for him, to push back the chunks of hair that had fallen over his face. But she didn't want to wake him.
She would wait until he woke—or events overtook them. Shifting to find a comfortable position, she blinked. Then rolled slightly again.
Her stomach ached, but it didn't stab at her, screaming like it had just hours earlier.
Was this really the lion's blood? Or had Aymora given her pain killers that made her feel this sense of… shimmering?
Probably both. Whichever eased her pain, Elia was grateful. The memories of those moments she'd been awake in the forest turned her stomach. If she had still been feeling that…
She put a hand to her stomach, gentle over the bandages. They were very low, she realized. The gash… had it been intended to disembowel her? Or something else?
Elia's blood chilled as she remembered the wolf-woman's vow that she would die slowly, and in pain. She swallowed against the nerves that rose—but alongside them, a fierce determination. A resolve within her.
She had lived. She had almost died, but she was still here. She remembered her prayer and smiled dryly. Reth would say the Creator had, indeed, had a plan. She still wasn't so sure. But there was no doubt, Reth's arrival couldn't have been better timed. When Lucine had come at her that last time… she'd known. She'd known she was about to die, and she'd surrendered to it.
Swallowing hard, she stared at her mate. He was exhausted, and beautiful, and strong, and he'd come for her. At cost to the entire people of Anima. He had come for her.
Her face fell and she swallowed tears.
She knew what she had to do. She knew what he'd asked her to do, and what she'd refused, and now she understood why she'd been wrong to do it.
But the doing of it… that was going to be the hardest part. For both of them.
Panic rose in her chest when she scanned his beautiful chest and realized she probably only had hours left to see it until… until when? Who knew how long she'd have to stay away?
She bit her lip and settled herself in a comfortable position, letting her hand rest over his that was extended to her cot.
He stirred for a moment, but didn't rise out of sleep. He truly was spent. She curled her hand over his and watched him in the dim light.
She would drink him in for as long as she could. Because she knew, as soon as it was safe for her to move, she was going to have to leave.
And then, apparently, she was going to have to fight to want to stay alive.
She sighed heavily, and his hair fluttered around his face. His eyes blinked open, and he was alert immediately.
"Love!"
"I didn't mean to wake you," she whispered as he pushed up on his elbow and leaned towards her. He didn't even speak, just laid his lips on hers, gently.
She sighed and put her hand in his hair to keep him there a moment, before he pulled away to meet her eyes. "How is your pain?"
"Completely bearable," she said, awed. "I'm… stunned."
He nodded and some of the tension went out of his eyes. "Aymora is smarter than I gave her credit for," he said, with a forced smile. "Is there any… is Elreth…?" he stumbled and her eyes ached to see him so uncertain.
"As far as I can tell, she's fine," she said. "I don't know, of course, but…"
"We'll have the others check you later—the ones who can smell her. They'll make sure. But Aymora believes she's stronger now than yesterday."
"That's good. That's so good," Elia breathed.
They stared at each other a moment, then he groaned and dropped his forehead against hers, his eyes screwed tight. "I have never been more afraid than I was yesterday," he said in a strangled voice. "I almost lost you. Both of you."
She gripped his neck and closed her eyes. "I'm so sorry."
"Sorry?!" He pulled back again, frowning at her. "What are you sorry for? Jak took you from the cave, right? You couldn't have—"
"I'm sorry I refused to listen to you, Reth. I know it's too late, but I get it now. All of it. Everything you've been saying about how I am your weak point. And why I need to… to go back. I wasn't listening from the right perspective. I'm sorry. You were right. I can't believe you didn't get to the bears. I can't believe—"
"Shhhhh," he shushed her leaning in further to pull her into his arms. "Don't. Everything has happened as it was supposed to, I think."
"How can you say that? People died yesterday!"
"And you didn't, despite the odds. I am… so grateful."
They stared at each other for a long moment, then Elia swallowed and Reth's eyes widened slightly.
"I'm healing really fast, Reth."
"I know. I'm so grateful."
She nodded. "I'm going to be fine, soon."
"I hope so."
She put a hand to his beautiful face and kissed him softly. "When I'm well, I'll go. Like you asked. We… we need to plan that. Tell me what to do, and how we'll do it. What's… involved in getting back. I need to prepare myself. I don't want to, Reth. I don't want to leave you, but… I see it now. I'm so sorry I didn't see it before. I'll go, Reth. I'll go."
His face crumpling, he buried himself in her neck, wrapped her in his arms, and squeezed her close.
Neither of them spoke for a long time.
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