Chapter 731 - Not His Place (2)
Having her by his side, Zhang Jiren felt a bone-deep satisfaction and a sense that everything was right in the world. But a part of him kept reminding himself that it would soon be lost, as Li Meili would eventually leave him and wouldn't want him by her side anymore.
Zhang Jiren opened his eyes and watched his wife sleeping in his arms. He could imagine them like this in ten, twenty— or fifty years from now, but he really only had another year and a half with her before she brought up the divorce papers. Until then, he decided to fill his responsibility as a good husband and father to her child.
Was this love? He wondered. Was this instinctive need to protect her and to care for her considered as love? The feeling of peace and contentment as he found himself smiling at her— was this love?
He should have known better that having her by his side would affect him and change him somehow.? But it was too late for regrets now that he already grew feelings for the woman currently sleeping in his arms.
At first, he thought what he felt for Li Meili was gratitude, because she had done things for his twin sister that he should have done instead. But the more time he spent with her, the more he realized how amazing a woman she was.
It made sense to him now why she and Tang Moyu get along so well. Li Meili was the only person who understood his twin sister so well. He wished he could tell her how he felt, but knew that only rejection awaited him.
It was impossible for Li Meili to get over and move on from Tang Beixuan's death so soon. It's only been half a year since he died, and there was no doubt that he was still the one who owned her heart. There wouldn't be any space for Zhang Jiren to occupy and knew well what his purpose right now in Li Meili's life.
Zhang Jiren knew that the possibility of Li Meili seeing him in a different light was quite low and he didn't want to make things complicated for her.
Li Meili opened her eyes when she felt a pang of hunger. The master bedroom was dark and she could sense Zhang Jiren sleeping next to her. Since this wasn't the first time she found herself waking up curled up next to him with her arm dr.a.p.ed over his c.h.e.s.t, she was no longer surprised. She gently pulled away from him and checked the time on their nightstand.
The clock said it was already two in the morning. She couldn't believe she slept so long! The last thing she remembered was dozing off next to Zhang Jiren when they were outside, at the pergola.
She got up carefully, trying not to jostle Zhang Jiren from his peaceful slumber. Only when he was sleeping that Li Meili could tell that he was at peace. He had a busy day ahead and she didn't want to disturb him.
Li Meili put on a robe and padded barefooted to the kitchen downstairs, careful not to make a sound. The marble floor was cold and smooth so she padded her way carefully so she wouldn't get into an accident.
Before she opened the fridge, she found a note from Elder Lan saying that she had left some soup for her to eat. The Black Nightingale's face lit up, a smile blooming from her lips as she took the soup and reheated it over the stove.
While waiting, she took the sliced bread and rummaged the fridge to make a sandwich. In no time, she made a ham and cheese sandwich for herself.
"You should have woken me up if you are hungry." Li Meili heard a familiar voice and found Zhang Jiren joining her in the kitchen.
He went straight to the sink to wash his hands before turning his attention to the stove and eyed the soup being reheated. He then took two bowls from the cupboard before turning off the stove and served the soup himself. Afterwards, he took a pitcher of water from the fridge and joined Li Meili in her midnight snack at the kitchen table.
"Sorry, I overslept again. Have you eaten dinner?" she asked as she took a seat across from him.
"I didn't notice the time," he said in response. He probably was so comfortable sleeping next to her that he didn't wake up until she did.
Li Meili bit into her sandwich. The saltiness of the ham as well as the sharp taste of cheese melted on bread created a nice harmony of flavors in her palate. As she sipped her drink, she surreptitiously looked at Zhang Jiren through her lashes and realized that this man could eat a lot.
Perhaps because he used to be part of their varsity team during their high school days that he was still able to keep his body fit. Zhang Jiren looked casual and relaxed as he munched on the sandwich she made earlier.
Still, although she was with him casually like this, Li Meili felt that the wall around him was stronger and higher this time compared to the first time she met him again and it made her gut twist to know that he was somewhat keeping her at arm's length. It was like no matter how hard she tried to breach it, she would never get to him.
"Did I do something wrong?" she unconsciously voiced her question out loud. It was too late for her to realize what she did.
"What?" Zhang Jiren stared at her curiously, not understanding where her inquiry came from. She looked confused and nervous at the same time. Did something happen?
On the other hand, since she already asked, she might as well confront him this time.
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