Chapter 1283 1283 Asteodia’s Parent Problems Part 1
--- Kat ---
Asteodia gulped down a few deep breaths before speaking, "Right. I suppose I was already thinking about this after Kat and I had that talk late last night, and I'm not totally sure that I'm ready for this but I also feel like I need to just get on with it. Like… like ripping off a bandage I suppose. This is going to be a bit rambly and more than a little all over the place, but I just… I think you all just need to let me talk.
"Especially you Nixilei. A lot of what I'm going to say isn't all that nice, and I doubt you'll want to hear any of it. Heck I'm not even sure I can get all the way through it but I want you to just… let me go. Kat's right, I'm not participating in any more events, so it should be fine, even if I have a little breakdown,"
Kat, Lily and especially Nixilei were all looking at Asteodia with concern. None of them were interested in causing Asteodia problems, and while Kat and Lily especially were pushing things, they certainly didn't want to cause her any real distress. At the same time… none of them made a move to stop her. There was a decent chance she needed this.
Asteodia took in a few more deep breathes before she let loose. "I guess this is it then. The first thing you need to know is that my parents are very traditional but they aren't nobles. I don't know what the story is there. Based on the way they talk about the current king I just can't be sure, but they really hate Auctifer for reasons I can't properly understand.
"They like to talk about all this stuff that we apparently don't have anymore thanks to Auctifer… but just based on the history they FORCED ME TO STUDY the elven lands are the most prosperous they've been in a long time. The only thing that seems to be missing is this… nebulous set of traditions and values that Auctifer no longer holds to… but I've never actually had those explained to me so I can't say what that's actually about. I mean, I have some ideas, but it's not important and I don't think that talking about it will really make me feel better.
"Or maybe it will? I mean, I'm just dumping this all out there at the moment. Perhaps it's worth going into, but from what I can tell I'm just using this as an excuse to avoid the real problems. Which is something I'm going to keep doing because I guess I wasn't as ready as I thought. Perhaps I'll be able to get to the damn point before I run out of steam, but who knows!
lightsnοvεl.cοm "For now let's not focus on that. Instead, we'll focus on the whole 'not nobles' part. Now, I've been punished every time I tried to subtly enquire about the truth of the matter, but as far as I can tell it's one of a few things. The first, is that we were a noble house and Auctifer stripped us of our titles…
"I don't think that's the case. Our home is nothing all that impressive compared to other old elf families and certainly nothing compared to the real nobility. Oh it's big with plenty of things on display, but I've seen a few real nobles houses while I was going around and doing adventurer stuff…
"But we just don't compare. Those sorts of holds are… OLD in a way I can barely describe. Now, I suppose it's possible that Auctifer kicked us out of my families original hold and then gave us enough money to set up a shittier version afterwards but I just don't really see it. Now the next option is that we're a family that was up for promotion by the old king. That we were almost nobles for some reason… and Auctifer decided not to go through with it.
"I find this to be a fairly likely option. It explains my parents and grandparents dislike of Auctifer, but I'm not totally sure about it. The dislike… or maybe hatred, not sure it crosses the line… but it just seems too impersonal, at least in my opinion. So perhaps they were denied by the old king, and then denied again by Auctifer? I really don't know, and I'm not sure I could ever find out,"
[Couldn't she just ask Marigold?]
*Not sure that's something she'd feel comfortable doing Lily. Heck, she's looking a little panicked just from this much and we haven't even got to how her family treated, this is just her families history.*
[Oh shit you're right. Damn, this could be bad.]
"Where does that leave us then? We aren't nobles, probably never have been nobles, and perhaps we weren't all that close to being nobles… so then why are these traditions such a big dam deal to my parents? My best guess is that my family used to be important merchants for the previous king that were, somewhat, but not very, close to being raised to noble status themselves. Perhaps they weren't close but they were confident they could get there in a few generations?
"Whatever the case, they are quite traditional, so are my grandparents and my great grandparents. Apparently I had an uncle and an aunt, but they're dead. I hear about them all the time, how good at following the traditions they were. I hear it… all the time. I know I just said it, but it bares repeating that I would not go a week without hearing about either of them.
"Now, I don't want to speak ill of the dead, so I'll just speak ill of the living and say that I don't give a shit about how good my aunt and uncle were at listen to my families' shitty talk on traditions because I hear the same talk every second week. They swap stories a few times like I have the memory of a goldfish and won't notice it's the same story if they tell it slightly differently a month later.
"Either that or my aunt and uncle had no life at all before they died and just repeated the same things over and over again, but considering there's other characters in the story, I'm guessing it's all just repeats.
"Enough about them though. Apparently I have to talk about my issues with my parents. Wait, no, there's one more thing to go over. We have a bunch of human servants because they're cheap labour. No offense to humans I guess, but with so many of them you can find cheap and mostly reliable labour somewhere.
"Of course, I don't want to imply they mistreat their servants, because that would be 'unbecoming of a refined elven family such us ourselves' damn I got a harsh punishment after asking that one. So they aren't treated badly… just paid well to do things and expected to act like furniture most of the time.
Asteodia's face was slightly red, and her voice had taken on an angry tinge. Kat and Lily were pretty sure Asteodia was trying to hold onto that anger to stop herself from breaking down. Nixilei had similar opinions, and was carefully rubbing a thumb over Asteodia's hand. Nixilei had stolen it at some point during the rant and didn't seem to be letting go of it any time soon. Asteodia's hand would occasionally flex like she wanted to hold onto Nixilei for dear life but Asteodia hadn't caved just yet.
"So, to really get to the heart of all my issues, I suppose we have to go back to when I was born," *Oh dear god. This cannot be good.* "Wait, no slight tangent, Kat, Lily. What you might not know is that elves have a remarkably high infant survival rate compared to the rest of the races, and especially humans," [OH NO] "yet despite this, my mother had five miscarriages, and two deaths within a week of their birth. I was the first child to survive a month past the day I was born,"
*Well holy shit. This just got… really heavy.*
[Yikes. Asteodia clearly has problems with her parents, but I guess we know where a lot of those problems come from. I mean… holy shit that's horrible. A human woman would be devastated by those sort of figures… elves though? This had to have happened over… god decades maybe.]
"I don't know how many years my parents tried for a child before I came along, the fact that I even know about the… attempts I do know about is because I overheard her crying about it to my father. So I know at least that they care for me in their own twisted way. Which might have made me feel better if they didn't fire my first nursemaid for getting too close to me,"
*Lily… I almost feel like we just shouldn't have asked.*
[Yes I agree but Asteodia is still talking, and she probably needs this. She's been bottling this all up for a long time. She'll probably collapse afterwards but the least we can do is let her get it all out.]
*I don't like it but you're right.*
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