137 She knew no other command
She blinked her eyes and then looked down.
He lifted her face up so that her averting eyes could meet his own and asked her again,
"Is it so easy for you to leave me and go? Do I mean so less to you? I bared my soul and showed you all my weaknesses. My life is opened in front of your like an open book to read, then why do you choose to close it and run away?"
She heard his questions but she didn't know the answers to any one of them. All that she could do was to feel the warmth of his touch, his breath mixing with her own and overpowering her senses. She stood there stuck to the floor like there was no way to move further.
His lips were dangerously close to hers and all that he could think of was kissing them. He could feel that she was getting hot. Her cheeks were all flushed and he could feel her getting all warm. They were both being ruled by desires but their mind had chained them with the shackles of morale that he didn't dare to breach and neither did she.
But somehow he dared to move a bit closer. His lips gently touching hers like the wind touches a flower, ever so delicately. It was a very gentle touch that lasted just for a split of a second, like one moment it was there and the next it was not, but she felt it. Each and every part of her body felt it. The sensation rippled through every inch of her skin and she instantly closed her eyes and her lips parted, gasping for air.
He opened his eyes and saw her closing her own and gasping for air. He brushed his thumb on her cheek and spoke in a soft tone,
"Open your eyes Akira".
She heard his voice and like a command from the Zedi, she opened her eyes and looked into his.
"Tell me that you don't love me. Look me in the eye and tell me that you don't love me. Tell me that it was just a fling for you. Just tell me once and our paths will never cross again", he said and leaned onto her again.
His hands moved from her cheeks and rested on the crevices of her neck. His fingers ran all restless on her bare skin and then he whispered,
"Tell me Akira, do you love me or not?".
All her shields were rendered waste. She stood there all defenseless and saw his ascension over her. There was no way in which she could lie to him. Feeling all helpless she said softly,
"I can't. I can't say anything right now. I just can't".
He could feel his hand getting moist with her tears again. Her tears tore his heart into pieces that probably he could never gather and put in place. No matter how much he tried to bear, he simply couldn't.
He released her from his embrace and took a step back.
His heart had been turned into mulch by her. But he was ready to be strewn on the path for her to walk over, such was his love for her. He gasped for air and then said,
"Then it's a goodbye, Miss Akira".
His Goodbye echoed inside her ears, her head and in her heart like he was wishing her for the last time like he was going to drift away the next moment.
Till now she wanted to detach herself, but the moment she heard him detach, her foundation was shaken. She looked up at him and saw a teardrop that started its destination from his eyes and slowly traversed his cheeks but before it could travel any further he wiped it away and turned his back towards her.
She saw him turn away and felt like she had lost him forever. The pain was insurmountable and unmeasurable. She wanted to say so many things but words just fell short. She wanted to leave as this was the golden window of opportunity to leave him for good but she couldn't dare to move an inch. She forgot everything that she cared about, the baby, the contract, Scarlett or Anthony, she couldn't remember any of them. All that she could feel at that moment was the hurt, for he had turned himself away.
When she couldn't take it anymore she mustered up her courage and said,
"Raymond I... "
He turned back and saw her brows twitched up. He knew she was in pain, struggling to get those words out. He knew she loved him and only him but he wanted to hear her say it out loud because with everything that was going on he wasn't sure anymore about anything in his life. He knew he had to let her be dictated by the people whom he loathed to be able to get to the root of the situation, but before that he needed to hear that assurance from her. In the world where everything was turning against him, she was the only ray of hope that he had and he couldn't just stand her vanishing into the dark. He needed her to lighten his heart before she did vanish into the dark clouds.
But she struggled standing up there unable to speak any further, torn inside by her morale which was forbidding her to say what she wanted.
But he couldn't take it any further and marched towards her with an urgency that was visible in his pace.
"If you can't say it then fine, show me", Raymond said inching closer.
Unable to understand she looked into his eyes, with questions swirling in her eyes.
"Kiss me back", he said and embraced her in one swift move. His right arm enveloped her waist and he pulled her close.
"If you love me then kiss me back", he said again and before she could understand he had already leaned in and was kissing her lips. This time his kisses weren't soft and gentle. They were very demanding and hungry like he wanted to devour her right there at that instant.
His hand which was resting on her back slowly moved a bit down and his other hand played with her neck. It was intense, it was passionate, it was emotional. He unnerved her with every single kiss of his and finally, she caved in and kissed him back. The moment she moved her lips and invited his lips to take her down, he halted for a second and detached his lips. A smile curled on his face while she twitched.
"You can only dare to love me and no one else",
He said and went back to kissing her. But this time he was needy but gentle. She closed her eyes and got lost in his arms for her body knew no command other than his.
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